'He BROAD CASTI


THE BROADCIST.
Maurice
Rowdon'.


THE BROADCAST.
Maurice Rowdon.


The Broadcaste
A-few wéeks: after my arrival in Baghdad I wasiasked to do
a broadcéston. the short-wave network. It was quite' a routine
thing for foréign teachers. to-be asked, but I still.felt it. as a
terrific honour. I had'never broadcast before, and the thought
of actually sitting in front ofa microphone with.my. voice going
all over the world, or' at. least: over thousands of-miles: d! it, was
ozciting to me, even: though it was.difficult to imagine anyone list-
ening. Perhaps there vere à fen amateurs. here En d therel a dozen
or fifty, dotted about the. world, who might listen! 'But it wasn't
the numbers: that counted;. it was the thought of my voice, travelling
mysteriously through the air, to'be picked up if need be in Londons.
Also could'write to people in England and: say
as if
simply,
happened to mc every
on the
day,
broadcasting
short-wavo
network at' such-end-such a time next woek, if you want to listen."
Thé young mân from 'the radio who came' to see. me during a break
in the lessons was rathor yellow-faced, plump and shy, with a certain
lethargy and hoaviness that seemod to hold him back from apeech and
: thought ali the time. He smiled and then withdrow the smile in an
abashed way- I was introduced to him by another toacher, and the
three df us sat together in the recreationeroom. at firsthe was
t4 a hnsadeasl
a too shy to ask mo .and réft it to the
And
teacher:
I, feeling
too honoured to speak, tried to hide my excitement in case he
8 suddenly withdrew the offeri * What subject would:I like to talk on?
- I' shrugged and asked what subjoot he thought ib uld be best. He
shrugged too, and there was si lénce. He seened very ill-et-eabe.
The other teacher was gétting impatien t---it took very little to
Y make him impationt. : "Well, decide something," he saidoes if to
two children. He himself had broadcast many times, and wrote out.


a-broadoast in a few minutes 3 .witha complete, indirterênce to thè'
honour involved, which.I thought: was marvellous. Hedid eve erything
withthis magical swiftress, his brain teéming with_words' and ideas,
--of which a-broadcast :
iséemed.a tiny particle, thrown off ina moments
But Iknow that if Igotidowa to writing 'onei wouid spend.hours on
it, going over it again and again until it.made.herdly any sense at
all.and lay before mo without a touch of foily in it,"hothing easy
or unsupervised to.give,t interest; + it would-be cl ipped down to
the economical mindmum, because of my-sense of the honour being
bestowed on mé a What an insultto the ràdio station just to talk,
se *
likeia pérson, like me; .not on.your life, one must give them. some-
thing. so Worked-on and. réliahle that it stood before tl hem like a
pioco of aculyture---stone; but of. course stone- was. very chill to,
the toucht And all the other. teacher - hadto do was. to sit down and
rvrite out a few peges in exactly-the same magical way -as. he- talked
to me; .and it-was finished. I envied that s0 much, and rosolved
to, try and-ao the. same's.
The subject was décided on, aftera few
I wa's todo
minutess
what'every other teacher had done before me, déscribe my sènsations
on coming to Baghdad for: the firettime. Vory welly that sounded
easy enough; ali had to do 3 was to give a. truthfui account of what
I had felt in the first few moments of seeing-the.oity." In order
to.dapture that-magical ease "of myi fellow-teacher, I mist be natural
and strictly truthful; there must be no littlo excursions, no
reverys in that way-I wouldnt get into difficultiès and begin
writing the thèmes: : for a dozen. or'so possible other broadcasts,
but keep to one theme 5 my immediateisdnsations on coming into. the
city; for once in my life I would.do something simple and easy;
not bog mysolf domn. in torturing thoughts that'by therend got the
better of me and mado ne forget what the original theme had be en.


siso; théy paid well. for: these broadcasts. If Icould doit well".
and without
a-lot of trouble I could maké quite a bitextra, and
have that affluent feeling.or money C oming in irresistibly, even
against, my will, with'a'flow ofits. onn, as.if myfingers had gold
in them; - that was how"my" fellow-teacher seemed.to work; the'aidhit
bothor to.pick up his chequés from the radio station'for weeks some-.
: times; apparontlys thè :radio station was very slow in paying; he *
let the flcw look after itself. He wâs a person with a kind of
Eastern ringnificoncé, though' hewas English;' I loved. sittirg in one
or'the'rivor-side hotols 'with him. in the evening listoning to his *
talk;" it seemed that-the magical élement of thocity was in him
too: Herd bèon there some yéers. and: already spoke good Arabic;
ho. had nothing to do with-Embassy people, - and' prided. himself on
nover
Embassy
and on
going'to British
dinner,
having oniy Arab
friends; he' gave Arab-nitionblist specches. to his clastos, a ways -
withthe magical olement that came into his other talk, into his
broadoasts, end'éven--for me- -into. tho way he walked up the stairs
torl his classroom in the
as if everything
mornings
was-an excitoment
forhins His impatience and irritation were. enjoyable, too; I
1decided to set-about 'ny broadcasts with-asimiler hurried and rest -
:. less prolificity, if Icould; : perhaps in that way I would prevent
mysolf trying, to: bore too many. tunnels in too many afreotions,
through territory nobody had asked me to explore..
On. the way back to. the hotel that morning I thought about.
it, trying to: find a.possible cpéning; at the seme ti me I triad
not to think. about ittoo hard, since I had agreed' with myself not
to go at. it heavily this times Also,mif I thought. about it. like F
this too long all the pleasure nould go---the.pleasuré of doing
something light. that would come. naturally off the tips of. niy -


ARF
fingers, and yer earn me money; why did.I want: to rob myselfiof
that sensation?! S6:Iforced it out'of my mind,
But
or'tried to
I-was. excited. Would I be i netvous."when I. broadcast? -
As. soon as lunch was over. I leaped upstaire to'me:roon and.
got
m to Works It-had: aiready oteurred. to me that perhaps the. bèst: way
of: approaching the subject was to compere. Baghdad with another city,
a: quite different. city, a. European one perhaps a I'd-been to
Viennà a-about-a month- before: m what about. making a comparison with:
Vionna? e - so I setto.work, I reninded
myself that: perfect truth-
fulnoss, or rathér perfect fidelity to the'i facts, and êven to the
chronology -of my sensations, was the thing;
would. maintain
air_or natural. Lease, and not disperse myself into ideas"that I sould
later find too. oomplicated to disentangle and too interesting to cut
outs My room overlooked': rooftops and I had
aricha
acomfortable
with.a little table in Tront'of'it; I set'n myself down to work with
a pleasant senso. of éxcitement. The thing took me-a few minutes--
the rough draft; forI
myself to: think -of-iriting out.
didh'tellow
the finai broedcast at once; there had.first to.be the. rough draft.
I made the comporison with viénna, I compared Vienna to a
musoun, a kind of: historicai museum of : towering, imperial monu- 1
ments'which drarfed the, modern citizen, whereas Baghdad thronged :
with things thât visibly and obviously had been made by men'd hands-
everything from the ramshackle one-stéory buildings: on 01 thér si dé
r.of-the main stroet. to'the uneven cobbles underfoot, and. theTobos
-and. veiise - Nothing towered above, one,and intimidated ones
The air was "loud wfth criess Itawas like. being. swept into a:hot,
deafening, briiriant-arena t of --people; the still, watchful: a
monuments,of"our European,Wofid, that made us feel 'like dwarfe,
weren't there; with the dirt ând noise,'the donkeys and. mules who
pushed past péople'on the pavements, the tumbledownroofs and the


muddy holes in the road;"tho :
rags. of tho-beggars and - : thd: Blaring
radios from éver'y .café, thère vas-alsoa new 5
into-which
diznity
one
entered, of E aorid nadeto fitmen,, to-fit their "areama, not of a
monument made-above anabéyond them, so that
a'real intinate dignity.
-no longer shoned in their: riesh; thèsé people: in thestreets of
Baghded, had it: stilishowing in' their: black eyes and in.thé
way they
waiked; and:the
noisy," -sparkiing, street was. like dréan Ita ofton.
hadibut hadnever hoped.to actually wake: into.ond
Itried to
put thermatter bâlalys. as.befitted'a
went, thopugh the
broadcest,-ai
draft cutting out sentences that seemod to rely tooi-strongly on my.
own.f feelings; and Idiàntt grast the: comparison I'was trying to
-make as ncatly. as Iwould haye likea." + But at leist it was : stmplé,
That at lésst I could make: suro,of. Every sentenca. and phrasé must
have: a linpid, disarning touch of simplicity; ohe broadcast, one
theme - : and the thèmo. was'a comparison between the. Europeen -dity
share: which. wais d *nonument* o1 *nuseum* high above thé men who
actuelly'malked.ito - stre rcets, -and the-Arab city whero the.. poople who
were
walked the. strects were the.city-- -nkat what: the city was.
when téa arrived I had finished 16. That wasritt surprising
as I always didmyfirst drarts quickiy, It was only tho.doubts
afterwards
and'self-exeminations SMLEXENRRCORSNUX that, cost the worke: As it
héppened,myTellom-tedcher cailed in' - ona më in the evening and I
shoked it to him. To my surprise he.said it was fine, thougha
little stylistic:for a broadcest. We would téke it along to the
k radio station:that
evening, and"porhaps. do'thë recording there and)
theng, for most.or the broadcasts.were pre-reitoorded: Theré was'
alsoa chance that I could do' alive broadcast; sometines one
was
vacant: until the laat minutes Oùr young friend was at the: studios
évery 'evéning, end.he would,take tha tatk into the: talks-direatot
for a final.0.K.


So that was
and.after dinner 'we went off'in
that, :
the: fellow-
: teacher's car, anola.citroen with. wide wings, dusty
and noisy,
with.the same: magioal.air'as its. omer. 4 We drove.to the
outokirts,.
through: muddy, yellow lanedwith palm -
treés, :' in thè : warnish, autumn-
el airs until we -reachèd the-lorgs squat shed's. of the radio
station,
whore:there wore masts. anacandrète walis. ano an air of science
quito different from the
But there: were
ditys
still'pelm trees,
and ths studios inside heda less.Intimidating look than the outsidé
led one'to.expect. We- passed dstudio. Vhere a string trio was *
rehearsing rith serious, matter-Bf-fact expression's on their faces,
before.a microphone; theré was the.noise of atmospherid from a
"Toudspéaker, -
and theisound of friondly, shouting voices from one of. iE
the control-rooms. Heros toos nothing towered. above oné; there
raentt: the miffled, ordered, smooth-walled isolation'I expected in
a broadcasting studid; the corridors, had no. carpets,. and the walls
Wérérrough, without distemper, their plaster crumbling like dried
ind. e wereu gréeted by.the.young man, who took my tàlk and asked
us witha'smile towait: in one of the waiting rooms, where there
werè. those tubular-steel ichairs that had once been the ultra-modérn.
.style in the Thirties. Yes3 the young.men said, a broadcast was
due in about firtéen- minutos; i'could take this one. I nearly.
jumpéd. out of my skin. Féathers started. in my belly andI.oould
à hardly.stop. my hands froxi shaking.
He waited quite aiong time. Tén minutes or so: It was
perildusly neer broadcasting timés Thèn the young. man réturned,
with,a troubled look" on hisface. He had my talk in his hande
It. wouldn't do at all,-1 he said:: The director had
réad it
just
- and thought it was raiegracefui * and' ke certainly wouldn*t allow
it to be. broadcast.
What was disgraceful about it? ve asked.


It "attackedt Baghdad.
Attacked?:
Hé held the: first page out.to ma, showing me the first. few
sentences, as if the director. had:inspired hin fully with his own
indignation,
- where was the attack? I asked: -
Ne watched his finger travél along somo-of the'lines
I sawa voman. sitting on the pavemont, r
her voil arawn- aoross her
faceser I saw:the cracked roadp.the pilos of rubble, thebroken
pillarss. the. scaffolding,. the-wolls-bogimning to,fall awàys the
filth. in-tho guttersaet Ifelt that. this was-acity whose péople.
didntt ceré for .outward signs, For me it is, only. of the: réligious
man that'it cani , be said, 1He doesn't need outward'signs'. I
donttnon, why it.15, but I instantly felt, "This.isa cityiof
roiigious peoplos' We say *London* and.+Faris', and vhat we.mean
are piaces, but: I.say Baghdadt to mysolf I' rean
what.péople
do'here ênd-what péople are hère, not what their builaings aro,
: because the buildings are many of -thom ranshackie and
many
airty,
- of" them are on the way to'faliing down;: it it acity of ugly -sights
and:
ugly noisés, there
spit. all. over the
réfuse is
pavoments,
thrown into'the t
gutters, people. sleep. .on the pavonents, miles-and
donkoys go. among the. pedestrians, peopies"waik barefooted in the
streetsaf That-was insulting to Baghdad, the dircotor hud -
* thoughts and "certainly ho souldntt allow such a thing.to travel
all. over the worid from, Ràdio Baghdadt
I began to feel. indignant, and the young man withdrew a
little when I spoké, holding)up his hànd vith.a shy expression as
if to say-that: he.had ho part in the
Iquarrëls That'was'tite" truth,
I, told, hine * What sought I to have said, could he téli me that?
No; he replied, with his lips shivering.cver 9c al ightly,


hie coulan't tell. me . that, he: would never présum. to. do'so.
What aid the direotor: think I ought to say,; then? - -
- Well, he believed the' director wanted sonething nice said
about the oity; after all, I was a visitor, and naturally if I
was asked to broadcast. I:couidntt expect to'be ablé just to talk
insults down the. microphoné a
"But these aren't insultsl" I cried, "Théytre the vory
opposite! Why don't you' ask. the -director to read firthér on,
then he'il find that'it all adds.up_to an appreciation of the city!"
Had the,director. read further on?
No, he had .only, read the first page or so.
"Then please take: it back.to him, with my compliments and ask
him.to : read the whole t hing, and thén decide whethor I'm.trying to
insult the city or noti"
He went back, and the other teacher and I discussed it. quietly.
Perhaps, he said, -it was.rathér strongly-morded; aftér all,' on
* had to remember that this wasn't Paris ar London, it was a small
country struggling to set'up.some sort of modern, industrial life;
that might seem silly to us but for them clean, vell-paved cities
were en ideal, 3 a test of a country's_real value, and dirty cities
were a matter df shame; on'e had: to: realise that if one-started.
talking at once about the dirt, whatever.one" said. afterwerds, and
whatever one's motives wero, that at onee-oonveyed something shame-
ful to theme. ve couldn*tgo àll over the world, espécially the
Arab world, behaving as we aid,at home, withithe same kind - of free-
don; they. hadn*t 'reached that-yet; end, very understandably,
before they indulged in *freet comparisons' between thamselves and
-Vienna-or. Paris, they : wanted som of the social and political
galm we vero uoed to from.childhood.
But. I was indignant at this also; I said that. whatéver the


statoof a. country, whatever it looked forward. to, therewas.
alnays the truth, and that truth'couldn't be altered; and that if
this wasntt the time. for truth, here .and now at the radio sta ion,
then it wasntt the time for. mé to talk either, I would rathér olear
out and nevercome near the place againg because Iaidn't 1ike.un-
free people; freedom was: avchoice, not a development arranged by.
- : politicians, and these, people.cero.obvionaly afraid:of freedom,
they wero sitting in positions which they had: von
corruptly, by
fanily infiuence, : this applied,to the director sitting in his offide
- there afraid to talk to me personally, and to.the young man who :
was: his' pandar and-tout; and.of course they were efraid' of freedom
because they would be-the first people to be pushed out if thè truth
vere -
boldt + They were probabiy very well avare that ifthe truth
about: théir sirty streétsand their begg gers and ramshacklo buildings
went all ovér the.vorid people: would: bègin to I wonder---inside Irag :
as well-what the smail class of influentialy péople were doing
with public money,, what they were doing with the profits that came
from the oil-fields, what, they were doing for their own peoplet
or'course thoy didntt wan't. freedomt
Ay-follom-tedoher onjoyed my outbursts much'as'i enjoyed his,
and he answored quiotly, witha little smilén that this was all
very well, and finaliy hé "absolutoly.agreed with me, but "here we:
were in a radio station dueito *go on' the airr (it' sounded'so
profeasionaly,and à sensé of the honour returned to mé) in. a fev
minutes, without a'talk being ready. Coula I write,
élse
samthing
quiokly, in place of the first paragraph? No, Iwàs détérmined
to make them take that talk or nothingt
The young man. returned a. second time and'said that the director
hadntt -changed his mind, and 8 uldntt read the whole talk at the-
momént because he-was too busy.


Vèry welly could: I see the. director:
totalk"the matter over :
tith. him?.
Nos he' was afraid not; the diroctor.was too:busy..
That wasthat, thent - Itook my talk back end. told him. that:
I had nothing else to orfèr.
The young man smiled andisafd. that, arter all, there- vere.so
many nice things in the dity I oould have' written.aboutt
Oh, i agreedt - But what did he have in mind? *
Weil, hé replied, for instance the King Féisal square; the
city wasntt all dirty and-ramshaokle, :
King Foisal squàre: was the one tiny part of toim, just' outside:.
my hotol, which was Biropean- in'style, with pavements and ordered -
buiiaings round it, in theform of a crescènt, not unlike the on-
tranceto an up-to-date. prison.
Wasn*t-that beautiful? hie, asked.
I agreed, it.was dertainly excellent, but: it. wasn't.the truth
about Baghdad, vas it?
Why not;he asked, still witha smile,-it wàs thère; wasn't
Indeed, it was there, but itwasn't. as much theré: às-the_rest
of the.city! And if Igave it out over the'air that here was a
L well-paved European city where 'overybody wore
trousers
jackots.and
and'ail the, buiiaings along -the main strèet vere depor-tment-stpres,
'not, only. would it be vory boring but people woulan't believeme,
and they vould ialso call me à foal for tolling them crass' and
obvious
liest :But if that was what he. wantod he should have toid. mé at
thê beginning, the first moment hetd seen me, he should have told
-1 me he- wanted porpagenda ànd not a radio taik; and what i moent by
propaganda was a smooth publicity designed tokeep certain people
in comfortablo and. entirely folse social positions which othérwise


they. would lose if there: wèrè fréedomt
Buti since the young. mén's English was. poor I don't bel ieve he
undérstood this fush of.
léss
Words,-much
the dig. at-himself and the
director. My fellow-teacher . vas still determined to patch things
up if he could; and taking.thé talk in his hand he said, nSuppose *
we make a few altérations?"
asked
me if, I would mind cutting
out a' few sentences, and, I shrugged in a tired way,. intimating that
whatever héppaned : now- wasntt any'concern of miné. I still, wanted
to sit down în front.of. the: migrophone, if only to prové to myself
that: #
I could do such things, that I could perform one boknowledged
public act in this busy world without gétting into an.avfal mess
over- itt, After all I had a good job; therewas somthing of'a
position in that : : why couldn't I extend my status to other things?
But I knew, really, it was hopeless. + I. let. thé other téacher run
his pen t hrough the offending passeges, and I "sat there in' a passivé
state while the young man went back a third time to thè direotor.
But out he ceme again,. and said that the director wasn't interested
in_any form of broadcast I might want to make, So that : was that.
And. thére was a certain relierfor me, that unfree people should be
offended by, me, and snub me At the .s'âme tim I'was hurt; and
still indignant. My friend: shrugged, and we went baok to my hotel,
The talk looked old and grubby now on the tables
whenever one of the other teachers mentioned that he was going
to. give. a. radio talk, 4 in the following weeks, I was silent and
ambiguouss It was a relief to mé - that I was still, so to speak,
alone, unflattered by the established powêrs, by thè néw status
quo of radio and jomrnalism and so forth. at thè same time it was
a sorron; I could see a hard, Bad journey ahead; .untold bitter-
perhaps, that would test all my powers.
ness, skxiggt txatxtknxmmkkagappetuxngxxoxkr
Also I was. getting


into struggles at the college, in my Work, I gaye lessons out
of hours, orgeniseda misic-blub, but it was misintérpréted.as solf-
assertion, deisgned to to other péople. downe Yet, on the.
surface,
they were. agreeable. : The matter of the. radi-talk was at burning
fragmént in the midst of. all this, thtough which. I saw' myself held
back all - the time, unable to:sày what I thought
But, strangely, almost at'the end of my first, yéar, just before
the examinations, 2 the young man from the radio. happened to come to
the college ogain, and we gréeted éach - other in.the recreation-roome
Hè asked me with exactly the sume shy and gracious expression: as
before, in his hesitating English, if I wouldn't 1ike to doa broad-
cast, he had: beën so: aisappointed the.other time, and had expected
me to: come again; for himself, he said, the talk. would. have been
all right, but. there were other subjects, such as. literature, which
hewas sure I vould like.to talk about; it would be a great help
if I could give him'a couplé of short talks on any literary sub jeot
I. cared to suggest; he had big timetables to fill up,and there
werentt enough talks to meke a programme.
So. I-did it. - I wént to my room that + day and wrote two talks
straight off, one" on the: rolé of the animal in romentic writing,
the other 'on Stendhal. I'didnet look at them whén I'd. finished
them. They were compact and of one theme, They were done in a
few minutes. No,rough draft. I didntt really care about them.
By that time, after nearly thrèe terms, I had done enbugh talking
not to want to, do:muoh more out. - of hours, and I'd got used to the
sound of my voioe.
The talks were taken at once; since, first, no' one would
listen to them, and.since, secondly, no one 'at the studio could
understand them, acceptance # as easy; they were: safely.historical
and recondites I recorded them without. much interest, certainly


without. feathers in the. tummys I went alone to: the studios. It
was beginning to get ftightfully hot, and this encouraged a, kind
of rich, easy dadifference such as the sheikhs of the: city. always
seemed to have. Iread the talks throigh casually,_one after the
other, gis watched by three engineèrs' in thé control-room, who were
làughing and joking most of the time. I co uldh*t hear them, only see
them, making gestures and smiling: liké people in a silent filma
Then they waved to. me when it 'was over, and the light in the'wall
turned green again. The tape was played back to me in the control-
room. I was horrified at the sound of my own voice, when it came
bellowing out of one"of the spéakèrs. - It seemed to me, this. little
mechanism that stored and, amplified voicès, to. offér the ultiaaté
chasm of self-consciousness. I wanted' : to get away, feeling hot
a round the néck, while the engineers sat in the same attitudes. as
before, apparently not sharing the harror.. I never. wanted to make
a- broadcast again. It séemed a. cheap, stupid thing to 'do. Fancy
talking to people you t couldn'tee and néver would seèt Whet a
nasty way of omploying half-an-hour, in the dead atmospheré df a
studio where everything looked fetid and uncleansed.by light and
airt Ifelt stained and dulledt How much nicer the city was
with its stiff palm trees, and the. stenches from the river, and the.
hot,"still air, and the bldnding lights, and the minarets that
giowed in the eveningt Thé dity of fugly'sights and ugly noisest
was so much nicert Why talk about it. to the silont air?