THE. UNEXPECTED: WEDDING
MAURICE ROWDON


CHARACTERS
REGINALD PAGE
JEAN PAGE
GORDON PAGE
KATE RIDOLFI
ESMERALDA RIDOLFI
GIORGIO RIDOLFI
COLIN TRELAWNY
REGISTRAR
GINO
ARTHUR WAINWRIGHT
LANGUAGE-CLASS PUPILS, SECRETARY,
NURSE, RESTAURANT GUESTS ETC.


THE KITCHENETTE OF A SMALL S.W.
LONDON HOUSE.
JEAN PAGE, IN HER
EARLY EORTIES, IS GETTING BREAKFAST
AS THE TITLES COME. UP.
SHE PUTS
TEA. IN THE POT, POURS.
THE TOAST
POPS UP IN THE RACK.
SHE WALKS
QUICKLY NEXT DOOR TO THE LIVING
ROOM, WHERE THE TABLE IS LAID FOR
THREE. AT TWO OF THE. PLACES
THERE. IS A BOILED EGG, KEEPING WARM
UNDER EGG COVERS MARKED 'REG' AND
' JEAN'. JEAN GLANCES OUT OF THE
WINDOW, WATCHES THE WEATHER FOR A
MOMENT.. THERE IS THE SOUND OF A.
FACTORY HOOTER OUTSIDE.
JEAN (CALLING) Reg! Come on!
(AS SHE PUTS THE TEAPOT DOWN AND
THEN THE COSY ON IT) Reg!
REG (VO) All right, give me a chance!
REG,, ALSO IN HIS EARLY FORTIES,
COMES BUSTLING IN IN HIS QVERALLS,
RUBBING HIS HANDS TOGETHER.
REG: Blimey it's nippy.. (SITTING
DOWN) That thermostat all right?
JEAN: You've got thermostat on
the brain.
It's seventy-odd-- -
what more do you want?
REG (CRACKING HIS EGG) Where's
our
son---preparing for a
hard young s work?.
JEAN (ALSOFSITTING DOWN) I've
given up calling him of a morning..
REG: Did I hear 'em talking down
here last night, round about two?
Him and young Kate? Of course,
if you've got no work it makes no
odds when you come in at night.
JEAN: Oh leave the boy alone.
REG: Words!
Good God, that boy
gets through some words in a day!
Who the devil does he get. it from?


JEAN: Mum.
REG: : Yes but he talks sense. o
JEAN: Ha ha.
REG: Sometimes.
KATE'S LAUGHTER BREAKS. OVER.
THEY
GO ON EATING.
JEAN STIRS HER TEA.
REG BITES INTO TOAST, CRUNCH-CRNUCH.
CUT TO A. COLLEGE LIBRARY, WITH KATE'S
LAUGHTER STILL OVER. IN ONE OF THE
CUBICLES KATE, AGED 20, and GORDON,
EGED 19, ARE SITTING CLOSE. TOGETHER.
IT IS EVENING. SHE HAS BOOKS BEFORE
HER. THE LIBRARY IS OTHERWISE
DESERTED.
KATE IS FINISHING A
COLOURED CONTOUR MAP AND THERE ARE
VARIOUS COLOURED INKS ON THE TABLE.
GORDON IS TRYING TO DAB A SPOT OF RED
INK FROM HIS NOSE. WITH BLOTTING PAPER.
GORDON: It won't come off.
KATE:
That was the. idea.
HE DABS QUIETLY AND SHE RETURNS TO
HER WORK.
GORDON (LOOKING ROUND) I wish I
could work here. Ali these books.
I sit and dream about this college.
KATE: Dreamy! Always dreaming!
And still at school! Eternal school-
boy!
GORDON SEIZES ONE OF THE INK POTS AS
IF TO POUR IT OVER HER. SHE SHRIEK S
WITH LAUGHTER AND DASHES AWAY FROM U
THE TABLE HE CHASES/ROUND THE
Roil
LIBRARY, AMONG THE SHADOWS. WE HEAR
THEIR GASPED LAIGHTER.. THEY STOP IN
ONE OF THE UNLIGHTED CUBICLES AND WE
DRAW INTO THEM.
KATE (IN A WHISPER)
You'll wake. up
all the dead professors. We'vegot
lots of dead professors!
GORDON PUTS HIS ARMS ROUND HER.
THEY KISS, QUI OF BREATH, STILL
GIGGLING.
KATE: I've got. to finish (HE IS
NMORE INTERESTED IN KISSING) They
gave me the key because they trusted
me (LAUGHING AGAIN)!


SHE: TRIES TO STRUGGLE EREE.
GORDON= Say something in Italian.
SHE LOOKS AT HIM FOR A MOMENT.
KATE: Sei un bischero tu!
(SCREAMING WITH LAUGHTER)
GORDON (EHICKLING HER) What does
it mean?
KATE:
GORDON:
Yes?
KATE (TRYING NOT TO LAUGHEAGAIN)
It means you're very beautiful.
GORDON: It doesn't! (TICKLING
HER AGAIN) Say something else!
KATE: Sei tutto storto!
GORDON (IMITATING HER) To-to-to-
KATE: Say itl 'Sono tutto storto
GORDON: Sonnoh tuttoh tortoh eeoh!
KATE: Good! It means 'I'm complete-
ly twisted'T
MORE HELPLESS LAUGHTER AND TICKLING.
SHE" IMITATES A TWISTED MAN, WITH
CROSS EYES.
SILENCE.
GORDON: What does it feel. like---
having two countries?
KATE: Like being two people.
GORDON: Is that nice?
KATE: Yes. It means you have
two lives.
SILENCE.
GORDON= It's funny---I've noticed-
you talk to your mother and father
as if they were our age.
KATE: That's how they feel. to me.
GORDON : I can't even think of
my parents as human.. I mean I love
them and all that.
KATE: I've got to finish.


GORDON: You agree with them don 't
you?
KATE:
GORDON:
Your mum and dad. That
we shoulnd't be alone toge ther.
It's funny, you're English but you're
not like Pam and Bren and that girl
from Swansea.
You want to keep
your virginity.
KATE:
You should go with them in
that case.
GORDON: They're not in the same
class. Say something real nice---
in Italian, go on.
KATE: Ti voglio bene.
MEANING 'I. LOVE YOU': : SHE SUBSIDES
ON. TOTHE TABLE AND HE SOON FINDS.
HIMSELF LYING ON TOP OF HER.
GORDON (IN A WHISPER) Am I a schooll-
KATE SHAKES HER. HEAD.
KATE: You're heautiful.
beautiful man.
THEY BEGIN MAKING LOVE.
CUT BACK TO THE PAGE LIVING ROOM.
REG AND JEAN HAVE BEEN JOINED AT
BREAKFAST BY GORDON, WHO IS EATING.
TOAST WITHOUT MUCH APPEARANCE OF
APPETITE.
REG: Yes but what I mean is you
can have a lay-in when you want to,
not like other people who: go out on
a regular job. That's all I'm. say-
ing. I. mean I know you study but
it's not work like I mean it.
GORDON: Oh I see. So why do you
want me to go to the university?
REG: I haven't said a blime word
about it. AllI know is what your
teachers say---SO. I say,. all right,
let him have a go, let him try for
the university and then maybe he'll
get a better job than his dad.
All parents want to see their sons
better than theirselves. I don't
want you pulling up floorboards and
flicking switches all your life,
stands to reason.
GORDON: If your work's no good
why do you do it?


REG: I've got to do something
haven't I?
GORDON:
Why?
REG: How would you and mum keep
alive?
GORDON: You needn't have married.
REG (WITH A LAUGH) Well I needn't
have been born come to thatt
GORDON: I just don't get it.
You're supposed to be marvellous
because you've got a job, and I'g
supposed to be a layabout because
I read books, yet you don't want me
to do your work---you don't want me.
to. be marvellous like you!
JEAN (TICKLED) That's it Gordon!
REG: No I'm not saying that.
I'm just saying you could get it
easier than what I. did maybe.
GORDON: Oh. I see!
We're all out
for an easy time. That's the idea
of going to the university is it?
I still don't get it! I mean you
must get some kick out of being an
electrician, btherwise it's not worth
being allive!
REG:
Well I suppose I do get. some.
Otherwise I wouldn 't do it.
GORGON: So: you're doing what you
want to do! Like I said!
REG:
Yes but if I had a cushier
job with a bit more money I'd be
happier.
GORDON: Oh! The penny's dropped!
I've got a cushy job waiting for me,
that's why,I want to go to the
sity! It's. going to be dead
unjyer
easy!
I get itl
REG: Well it stands to reason you'll
get more money, if you qualify.
GORDON: That's wrong for a start.
Half the arts students in the States
are out of a job! And old Trelawny
gets about half yoi ur money-
REG: Who:'s Trelawny for God's. sake ?
GORDON: My history teacher. And
he doesn't get time and a half for.
fake overtime either!


REG:
Yes and I don't get nice
long holidays like he does!
GORDON: He works harder in the
holidays than he does in term!
And he likes his work! He can't
stop doing it! He told me so him-
self.. All that private coaching
he's giving me is for free.
we 're not all out for a good time
all the time!
SILENCE.
REG POURS, HIMSELF ANOTHER
CUP OF TEA, EATING BUSILY..
REG (STIRRING)
What beats me is
how long you can go without doing
anything---I mean with your hands.
GORDON: You're talking about
yourself.
REG: Oh I see. (TO JEAN) I'm
talking about myself. (TO GORDON)
How's that?
GORDON:
Well if you sat down
without a paper or a pint of beer
in front of you you'd have nothing
in your head. Whereas I've got
thoughts..
REG (HALF RISING) Oh you have have
you you snotty bugger----!
JEAN (TO REG)
All right! He's
only taking the mike!
REG:
You take the mike much more
mate and I'll show you the back of
my handf
You idling pênce!
GORDON PUSHES BACK. HIS CHAIR WITH A
CLATTER. AND STAMPS OUT OF THE ROOM..
JEAN: What did ycu say that for?
You know how. he. hates that word
ponce.
REG: Oh----I You and him! I
don't even know what the word means!
It just comes. out. He always had
to walk off like that---can't finish
anything---can't finish Echool-- -
can't start university-- -can't start
a job---Chralt knows what that girl
sees in him! She went to college
when she was eighteen-- --not him!
She's got her finals soon!
And he
hasn't started! (GIVING HER UNCONC-
ERNED FACE A GLANCE)
Expect me to
be proud of that?


CUT TO A SMALL CLASSROOM AT
GORDON'S SCHOOL.
THERE. ARE A FEW
DESKS SET ROUND THE ROOM CASUALLY,
EB COLIN TRELAWNY, A. TEACHER IN
HIS EARLY THIRTIES, AND GORDON ARE
THE ONLY OCCUPANTS. THERE IS NO
TEACHER'S ROSTRUM. THEY ARE SEATED
NEAR EACH OTHER AND TRELAWNY HAS
GORDON'S LATEST HANDWRITTEN PAPER
BEFORE HIM.
TRELAWNY:
Do you really see what
I mean?
GORDON:
I think so.
TRELAWNY GAZES AT. HIM WITH SOME
HESITATION.
COLIN:
There's another. point.
You don't really believe that the
peasants rebelled in the fourteenth
century just because they couldn't
bear conditions any more.
Somebody
once said that revolutions came out
of hope, not despair.
So perhaps
conditions in the fourteenth century
were better than they'd ever been
before.
GORDON:
Yes.
COLIN:
So why do you say the
opposite? I'll tell you why.
Because it saves. you trouble.
GORDON IS GAZING AHEAD.
PAUSE.
COLIN:
Did you get any of that?
GORDON: Yes.
COLIN:
It's not much use me giving
you private time if it's not going
to lead anywhere is it? I mean
you've got to pull your weight too.
COLIN: Yes, well,. it's no# good
getting emotional about it. You've
taken three university entrances and
you're not going to find a place any-
where unless you sit down and really
swear to get through. Because: you'vve
got all it takes. Kontsfirabwclens
mivermitymaterial---everybodyATONE
thetr


GORDON= It's no good swearing
if I read any more I'algo blind.
I mean, I think I read too much---
I get muddled up---as soon as I sit
down to write a paper it all fogs
over.
COLIN: And what ideas have you
got for later on---after university?
Do you want to teach?
GORDON: No.
COLIN:
Research?
GORDON: No.
SILENCE..
GORINH:
Civil service or something
like that?
GORDON : No.
COLIN :
What then?.
GORDON: I don't know.
CUT TO. THE COLLEGE LIBRARY. STUDENTS
ARE POU.ING INTO IT AT LUNCHTIME.
THEY SRE SHUSHED QUIET BY THOSE STUDY-
ING. WE FIND KATE AT A CROWDED
TABLE. IN ONE OF THE CUBICLES. SHE
IS TAKINGNOTES FROM A BOOK.
GORDON COMES IN, LOOKING ROUND.
HE SEES KATE AND GOES OVER AND SITS
OPPSOITE HER, GAZING AT HER WITH A
SMILE. SHE IS STILL TAKING NOTES.
THEN SOMETHING MAKES HERDLOOK UP
AND SHE SEES HIM. SHE MAKES A
DELIGHTED SMILE. SHE TEARS A PAGE
QUT OF HER NOTEBOKK AND WRITES SOME-
THING ON IT IN PENCIL.
WITH A
GLANCE AT THE OTHER OCCUPANTS OF THE
TABLE SHE PUSHES THE PAPER ACROSS TO
GORDON. HE READS IT..
WE SEE THE PAPER EROM HIS PV. IT
READS, IN BLOCK CAPITALS, 'I AM
PREGNANT'.
CUT TO THE PAGE LIVING ROOM. REG
IS WASHING AFTER WORK, AT THE SINK
IN THE KITCHENETTE. JEAN IS MAKING
TEA.
REG (STOOPED, AND BLINDED WITH WATER)
Got a towel there mate?
JEAN (PUSHING A TOWEL IN HIS OUT-
STRETCHED HAND) I. wish to God
ycu'd use the ba throom.
REG: Too nippy.


JEAN: Yes well I said we should
have had a radiator put up there.
Everybody has radiators in their
bathrooms.. But no!
REG DRIES HIMSELF BRISKLY..
REG: I went in his bedroom just
now---books ell over the bed-- --on
the dresser---he must do some kind
of work.
JEAN: He just needs leaving alone
that's all.
REG: Hè needs a job! A boy of
nineteen still at school!
CUT TO ESMERALDA'S LANGUAGE CLASS.
ESMERALDA RAIDOLFI IS KATE'S ITALIAN
MOTHER.
SHE IS IN HER LATE FORTIES,
DRESSED RATHER PICTURESQUELY.
SHE
IS TEACHING FROM A ROSTRUM AND HAS
A BLACKBOARD BEHIND HER. THERE ARE
A DOZEN OR SO PUPILS, ALL OF THEM.
ESMERALDA: Io vorrei-- -'I would
like ' But 1o voglio- 'I. want8.
And io ti vogzio bene-- 'I love you'!
(A LITTLE SQUEAL OF LAUGHTER ESCAPES
HER) So, what is 'I want'?
PUPILS: Ioh vohlioh!
ESMERALDA: 'I would like'?
PUPILS (HITH MORE DIFFICULTY) Ioh
vorray.
ESMERALDA: 'You would like'?
(THEIR EFFORTS FAIL) Io vorresti!
(ARCHLY) And 'I love you'?
PUPILS:
vorrei--
ESMERALDA: Io ti voglio bene! I
Notice please, I cannot make Tyou'
formal---I cannot say io Le voglio
bene-- -self-evidently, because we
donE fall in love with staangers!
(ANOTHER SQUEAL) Notice that we
Italians reserve adoro and 'amo'-
'I love', 'I adore'- -for things
rather than people. Io adoro
la tua casa-- -I simply adore your
house! I Io adoro. Mozart-- --io adoro
Parigi- -I love Paris! The reason?
In Italy we have the battle of the
sexes!


THE DOOR OPENS ANG GORDON PEEPS
INSIDE.
ESMERALDA LOOKS ROUND.
SHE SHOWS SOME SURPRISE.
ESMERALDA:
Yes Gordon?
GORDON:
Could I see you a minute?
SHE GAZES AT HIM FOR A. MOMENI AND
SEES THAT HE IS IN SOME DISTRESS..
ESMELALDA (TO THE CLASS) Eill. you
excuse me un momentino? Notice we
have one word for a 'tiny moment'.
The diminuitive is one of the most
decorative features of our language.
Now I am just going to have a word.
with this ragazzino- this 'little
boy'-- -and I shall be back with you
in un momentino!
SHE: LEAVES THE ROOM WITH GORDON.
CUT TO: EHE LOBBY OUTSIDE: ESMERALDA 'S
CLASS AS SHE: AND GORDON COME OUT.
THERE: ARE. HATS AND. COATS HANGING'
EVERYWHERE.
ESMERALDA. (GRIPPING HIS ARM) What
happened? Why isn't Kate with you?
GORDON: She's got a lecture.
ESMERALDA. (STILL GRIPPING HIS ARM)
What happened? (FACES CLOSE TOGETHER)
GORDON: She's going to have a baby.
ESMERALDA: A---? (STARING AT HIM
FOR SOME. TIME WITH HER MOUTH OPEN)
O Dio! No! No! Non ébossibilet
No! (STRIKING AT HIM WILLLY)
MaIscalzone-- --malscalzone che sei!
Porcaconel Mia figlia! Mia
ppvera figlia! 0 Dio! Che
facio, che facio?
SOME OF THE PUPILS EMERGE EROM THE
CLASS AND TRY TO RESTRAIN HER. - SHE
TEARS HER OWN COAT FROM THE WALL.
ESMERALDA (TO. GORDON) Dove sta
mia figlia? (GORDUN FAILS TO. UNDER-
STAND) Dove sta?! Where is my
daugh ter?
GORDON: At her college.
ESMERA :DA: Do you still drive your:
father's car?
GORDON: Yes.
ESMERALDA:
Then take me there!


GORDON: Where?
ESMERALDA: To my daughter!
(GRABBING HIM) Andiamo! E poi
ti sistemo subito eh? (PUSHING
HIM OUTSIDE) Scemo! Sei un scemo!
O Dio! Figlia mia! Che hai
fatto?
ESMERALDA AND GORDON DISAPPEAR.
THE PUPILS GAZE AT EACH OTHER.
PUPIL 1: What's the trouble-
anybody speak Italian round here?
PUPIL 2:
She called him a lot of
dirty names, that's all I know.
Porcacione means a dirty pig.
PUPIL 3: I thought I heard him say
her daughter was having a baby.
PUPIL 1: What!
And he comes and
tells her himself. He wants his
brains testing!
PUPIL 2:
That's English integrity.
PUPIL 1: English stupidity.
CUT TOT THE ENTRANCE HALL OF THE
PAGE HOUSE. A TELEPHONE IS STAND-
ING IN THE CORNER ON A SHELF.
IT IS RINGING- THE LIVING ROOM DOOR
OPENS. AND REG EMERGES, EATING, IN
HIS OVERALLS. HE TAKES UP THE
RECEIVER AND MASTICATES STEADILY
BEFORE BEING ABLE TO SAY HULIO.
REG:
Hullo?
ESMERALDA (VO) Do I speak to his
father? I. wish you to come to me
at once, can you get a bus, he has
your car, I have something to speak,
my husband.is not in!
REG (GETTING RID OF THE LAST OF HIS
FOOD PREMATURELY) Here, hold on,
hold on! Have you got the. right
number?
ESMERALDA (VO) He is with me--
you must come- --he is here!
REG= Whokhe hell's he?
ESMERALDA (VO) What is your name?--
Gordon!
Gordon!
REG: What, my son? What's up
then? Is he all right?
Who are
you?


ESMERALDA (VO, SCREAMING WITH
IMPATIENCE) Her mother! Her:
mother!
REG: What do you mean, 'her'?
You're talking about my son aren't
you?
JEAN EMERGES FROM THE LIVING ROOM,
ALSO EATING.
JEAN: Who is it?
REG: : That's what I'd like to know!
ESMERALDA (VC) O Dio, che imbroglio!
(SPEAKING TO KATE AT THE OTHER END)
Caterina, Kieni tu! Suo babbo
capisce fischi per fiaschi!
KATE (VO) Hullo, Mr Page? My
mother would like you to come over
and see us.
REG:
What's that? Your mother?
And who are you?
KATE (VC) I'm Kate.
REG: Oh, hullo Kate!
JEAN: Is Gordon all right---where
is he?
REG (TO JEAN) Be quiet, for Christ
sake! I can't listen to two lunatics
at once! Hullo? Kate? Fhat's up
then?
KATE (VO) Nothing. Only mum
would like you to come over and see
her---right away.
REG: Hell something must be up then
mustn't it? Where's Gordon?
KATE (Va) He's here.
REG: 'He's here' she says! (WITH
QUIET. IRRITATION) Hand him over will
you please dear?
GORDON (VO) Hullo dad.
REG: 'Hullo dad i. What's the
trouble now? You in a Spanish
prison or something?
GORDON (VO) It's Italian, not
Spanish.


REG: All right, when you've:
finished giving me lip, what's.
wrong?
GORDON (VO) Kate's mo.ther wants
to see you right away!
REG: So there's trouble isn't
there? Listen, are you too bloody
educated to form a simple phrase?
GORDON:
Well, she wants to see
you that's all.
REG (SLOWLY) What---is-- -the
trouble?
GORDON (VO) Kate's having a baby.
REG:
Oh blimey!
CUT TO THE LOCAL REGISTRY OFFICE.
NE ARE FACING THE REGISTRAR WHO IS
READING THE CIVIL WEDDING CEREMONY
TO KATE AND GORDON.
REGISTRAR:.. .Will you join hands
please? Say after me, I Gordon
Page, will take Catarina Maria
Ridoifi..
GORDON: I Gordon Page...;
REGISTRAR (TO KATE) Will you
please say after me., I CATARINA
Maria Ridolfi-
A. WOMAN'S SOBS ARE HEARD.
THE
REGISTRAR LOOKS UP AND MAKES AN
EMBARRASSED SHILE, THEN GOES ON.
REGISTRAR:-- --will take Gordon
KATE: I Catarina Maria Ridolfi
will take Gordon Page..
ESMERALDE'S SOBS CONTINUE. WE PULL
BACK TO FIND REG AND JEAN TOGETHER
AND, SOME SEATS AWAY, GIORGIO AND
ESMERALDA RIDOLFI.
GIORGIO IS A
MILD ROMAN IN HIS EARLY MIDDLE AGE
AND HE IS GIVING EHE SOBBING ESMERALDA
DRYLY IMPATIENT LOOKS.
ALSO PRESENT
AS WITNESS IS COLIN TRELAWNY.
REGISTRAR: Will you please put the
ring on the lady's marriage finger?
GORDON DOES SO. THE SOBS CONTINUE.


REGISTRAR: Well, now you are
married, and it remains for me to wish
you a long and happy life together.
You are both young--
ESMERALDA: : Pur- troppo!
GIORGIO. GIVES HER A LONG DRY LOOK.
REGISTRAR:
--very young, at the
beginning of your life and ---I am
sure-- --careers too!
ESMERALDA (CYNICALLY) Ha!
REGISTRAR: Nowadays: perhaps wE
tend to overlook the basic meaning
of marriage, which is. to have: children.
ESMERALDA: O!
GIORGIO= Ma Esmeralda!
REGISTRAR: There is nothing else
in marriage that can replace a. child,
and I hope- --I hope with all my
heart-- -that you will soon be a.
mother and father.
EEMERALDA: Sono: giat
GIRGIO: Ma Esmeralda, vuon che ti
porto fuori?
ESMERALDA: Si! Portami L inferno!
GIORGIO (TO HIMSELF) GRITTING HIS
TEETH) Mannaggia, misericordial
REGISTRAR: Now we just have to
sign the book--
TRELAWNYAS THE WITNESS MOVES FORWARD
WITH GORDON AND KATE. EVERYONE
FORMS A GROUP ROUND THE MARRIED
COUPLE, THOUGH THERE. IS NO REJOICING
CUT TO GINO'S RESTAURANT IN SOHO..
IT IS CROWDED MOSTLY WITH ITALIANS.
A LONG TABLE IN THE CORNER HAS. THE
WEDDING PARTY ROUND IT---GORDON,
KATE, TRELAWNY, GIORGIO, ESMERALDA,
JEAN AND REG.. THEY ARÉ ON THEIR
EIRST COURSE-- --MELON AND SMOKED HAM.
THERE ARE CARADES OF RED WINE AND
SEVERAL PLATES IN THE MIDDLE OF THE
TABLE CONTAINING. BREAD AND CROSTINI
IN CELLOPHANE PACKETS.
LOUD ITALIAN
TALK COMES OVER.
GIORGIO IS AT THE HEAD OF THE TABLE
AT ONE END, AND REG AT THE OTHER..


GORDON AND KATE ARE SEATED
TOGETHER, WITH KATE NEXT TO REG,
AND OPPOSITE THEM ARE ESMERALDA
(ALSO NEXT TO REG), COLIN TRELAWNY
AND JEAN PAGE (NEXT TO GIORGIO).
GINO HIMSELF IS LOOKING AFTER THE
TABLE, WITH TWO YOUNG WIATERS
GOING TO AND FRO. HE BENDS IN
CONFERENCE WITH GIORGIO RIDOLFI.
ESMERALDA (ACROSS TO KATE) Come
senti?
KATE. (WITH TENDER IMPATIENCE)
Bene, mamma, bene! (TO GORDON)
She always wants to know how I feel!
ESMERALDA (STILL TO KATE) Il
prosciutto non ti ha fatto male eh?
KATE:
No! Per carità! (TO GORDON)
She says did the ham make me feel
ESMERALDA: If I wish to talk to
Gordon I'm capable of doing so on
my own behalfi I not only speak
English but I teach it!
KATE: You teach Italian!
ESMERALDA (GIVING IT TO THE WHOLE
TABLE) To some of them I teach
English too---to those who are
happier with a screwdriver in their
hands, and a length of electric wire,
than a book!
GORDON FINDS THIS THRUST AMUSING
AND GLANCES AT REG.
JEAN: Oh. we've got to have people
working with their hands Mrs Ridoli
(PRONOUNCED RIDDLE-Y).
ESMERALDA IS MAGNIFICENTLY UNAWARE
OF JEAN.
REG (TO GORDON)
What's so funny?
GORDON: No, I was just thinking I'd
prefer a civilisation with candles.
REG:
You try and get your central
heating going with candles---I mean,
you're not an enemy of central heat-
ing are you? Considering you put
the thermostat up to 80-odd every
time you come in the house!
JEAN (QUIETLY)
All right, all
eight.
GIORGIO:
Now what may I order?


ESMERALDA: Io prendo un carciofo,
non condito!
KATE LAUGHS. GINO THE RESTAURATEUR
SMILES DOUBTFULLY.
ESMERALDA: Ma sil Ora che c'ho
un carciofo in famiglia---allora lo
mangio!
KATE LAUGHS. LOUDER.
GIORGIQ (SCOLDING ESMERALDA)
Esmeralda---un po' di educazione,
ESMERALDA. (WITH A. TOSS: OF HER. HEAD)
Educazione: F 'educazione '!
KATE (TO GORDON) She says. all she
wants Feat is an artichoke without
any dressing-- -she says she's got
one in the family now, so she might
as well eat one!
GORDON:
Got what?
KATE: An artichoke! It means a
fool!
GORDON (HIS SMILE SOURED) Oh thanks
very much!.
GIORGIO (TO JEAN) Now what would
you like. Mrs Page?
JEAN (WITH A HELPLESS GLANCE AT
REG)
Well, I'm not used to your
food- --I can find my way in Spanish--
REG: Let him order for you. You.
order what you think we'd like, Mr
Ridolifi. We '11 try anything-
once! (WITH AN ATTEMPED LAUGH)
GORDON: Oh dear!
JEAN (SOTTO VOCE, TO GORDON) Stop
taking the mike!
GIORGIO: Well I know what's good
here at Gino's---I recommend the
saltimbocca alla romana.
REG (ENCOURAGINGLY) Oh yes.
GIORGIO GIVES THE ORDER TO GINO.
ESMERALDA : Literally it means
'leap into the mouth'- --in the Roman
way!
REG:
GINO LEAVES WITH THE ORDER.


JEAN: It isn't alive is it
because (THE WINE GIVES HER A
SUDDEN CONFIDETIAL TONE) they told
me once ousters was alive, and I
never touched them again---you know,
Icouldn'tl---I went cold all over--
and I had it in my mouth!
ESMERALDA LEANS AWAY FROM HER.
REG MAKES SYMPATHETIC LAUGHTER FOR
JEAN.
ESMERALDA (LEVELLY, TOPEAN) Not
only is saltimbocca very much alive,
like all things. Italian---it is
impaled on a stick---in the cruellest
way.
CUT TO A LARGE PLATTER BEARING
A NUMBER. OF SALTIMBOCCHE (STEAK WITH
A SLICE OF BACON SECURED TO IT BY
MEANS OF A TOOTHPICK) AS IT IS
CARRIED SHOULDER-HIGH ACROSS THE
ROOM. FOLLOW IT TO OUR PARTY,
WHICH IS IN TALK EXCEPT FOR
ESMERALDA.
THE DISH IS SERVED.
WAITERS ALSO
SERVE FRENCH FRIED AND SPINACH,
ON SIDE PLATES. REG AND JEAN WATCH
THE SALTIMBOCCE WITH SOME DOUBT.
REG (TO ESMERALDE) well, I can
recognise the top layer---it's a
nice homely Ta sher of bacon, unless.
my eyes have been deceiving me
again.
REG TOUCHES THE TOOTHPICK.
GORDON (TO REG)
You've got to eat
that.
REG: Eh?
GORDON: That's not a toothpick
like it looks. It's a delicacy.
From Naples.
REG: You're a scream today.
Good thing you don't get married
often.
COLIN TRELAWNY AND GIORGIO REMOVE
THE TOOTHPICKS EROM THEIR MEAT.
WITH A LOOK AT GORDON REG DOES THE
SAME.
GIORGIO RAISES HIS GLASS
TOWARDS THE NEWLY MARRIED COUPLE.
GIORGIO: Le spose! (TO JEAN) It
means. the bride and bridegroom.
JEAN: Oh yes!


REG, JEAN AND TRELAWNY RIASE THEIR
GLASSES TOWARDS THE COUPLE.
ESMERALDA REMAINS QUITE STILL.
GIORGIO (SHOCKED, TO ESMERALDA)
Ma Esmeralda, veramente--
SHE RAISES HER GLASS SLOWLY TOWARDS
KATE.
ESMERALDA: A.mia figlia! (DRINKING
THE GLASS EMPTY, THEN WITH A. SMACK
OE THE LIPS:) Perchè haf fatto
la scioccaf
THE WAITERS LOOK AT HER WITH ASTON-
ISHMENT, UNCERTAIN WHETHER TO
LAUGH.
GIORGIO SHRUGS AND DECIDES
TO TREAT IT AS A. JOKE. BUT KATE
IS STUNG BY HER, MOTHER'S CEMARK
AND GLARES AT HER.
GIORGIO:
Here's health!
THEY ALL DRINK EXCEPT ESMERALDA.
KATE (TO ESMERALDA, WITH ANGER)
Perche vuoi. fare una scena? Sono
sposata no? AlTora? Ho scelto
mio marito!
ESMEALDA. (BURSTING INTO TEARS) Si,
si, hai scelto! Ma hai scelto
male! 0 Dio! Che disastro!
Avevo un sogno---di un marito--
per te! 0 Dio!
GORDON (TO KATE)
What's: she on
about?
KATE (WITH GLARES AT HER MOTHER)
She keeps on saying I've been
stupid---and made a bad choice--
and she always dreamed of a better
husband---E
GIORGIO:
Gatarina!
GORDON: Oh that's nice!
JEAN: It's no good crying over
spilt milk Mrs Ridoli. I. mean I
could have cried too (SHE NEARLY
DOES, PUCKERING UP HER LIPS) I
lost a boy of nineteen---an only
son---your girl's twenty-one---I
REG:
Don't you start!
JEAN: And I don't know whether he
did it!
There's no proof he did it!
GOROON; : Did what?


JEAN (TO GORDON)
She could. have.
had others! (FULL FLOOD NOW)
There was no blood tests-- --nothing
of that! Only what you said. (TO
ESMERALDA)! I reckon we was
pushed into it!
GIORGIO GAZES AT THE TWO WEEPING
WOMEN WIH COOL SCEPTICISM, AND
GIVES AN UPWARD GLANCE OF RESIGN-
NATION TO ONE OF THE WAITERS.
GINO BUSTLES. ROUND HIM.
GINO (WITH JOY) All mothers cry
on wedding days.
Che bellezza!.
GIOGIO (TO GINO)
Full the glasses
GINO DOES SO-
GINO (TO ESMERALDA, WITH ENCOURAGE-
MENT) Forza, signora! (TO JEAN)
Courage, madam! (Bending down)
Think of a beautiful grandson!
ESMERALDA: O Dio!
KATE: Well if it's going to be
this kind of party I'm clearing
off! (TO GORDON) Come on!
Let's go. and see. a film!
GORDON AND KATE GET UP BUT BEFORE
THEY. GO KATE LEANS OVER TOWARDS
JEAN.
KATE: And she didn't have others.
She had this one because. she loves
him!
GIORGIO (ALSO. RISING) Caterina,
vieni quoit Ma: Vieni! cocca mia!
HE GOES TO HIS DAUGHTER LOVINGLY.
SHE KISSES HIM, WITH A SPECIAL SMILE.
ESMERALFA (TO KATE) Si, vai. viat
Lascia la tua mamma! Si!
KATE (TO ESMERALDE)
Well promise
to behave then!
ESMERALDA (DRYING HER EYES) Si, si,
I promise to behavel
KATE DRAWS GORDON BACK TO THE TABLE,
AND GIORGIO MAKES A SATISFIED 'Oh-h-h!'
AS HE SITS DOWN AGAIN..
ESMERALDA (STILL DRYING AND HEAVING,
TO GORDON)
Vieni qui, figlio mio!
KATE (TO GORDON) She says go over
there.
You're her son now.
ESMERALDA (EMBRACING EORDON) Da
mi un baciettol


KATE (TRANSLATING DRILY)
Give her
a kiss.
ESMERALDA (KISSING HIM, THEN STROKING
HIS EACE)
Seinbello! Sei anche
bello!
KATE: You're beautiful.
GORDON : Yest got that bit.
ESMERALDA: Mia figlia ha scelta
bene!
KATE (EIXING HER MOTHER WITH HER
EYES) 'My daughter chose well'.
GIORGIO:
KATE (WITH A SIGH) Now perhaps
we can eat. (TO GORDON) Come on!
GO_DON RETURIS TO HIS PLACE.
GIORGIO (RAISING HIS GLASS AGAIN)
Le spose!
TRELAWNY (HE HAS BEEN SINKING WINE
QUIETLY) Ley sposey!
THEY ALL DRINK. ESMERALDA DRI NKS
WITH SONETHING LIKE DESPERATION,
AND. ALL BUT CHOKES.
SHE PUTS THE
EMPTY GLASS DOWN LIKE A HATCHET SHE
IS BURYING WITH GREAT UNWILLINGNESS.
SHE THEN BEGINS EATING, AFTER WITH-
DRAWING THE TOCTHPICK WITH A GESTURE.
OF CONTEMPY AND THROWING IT OVER HER.
SHOULDER.
JEAN TACKLES HER FOOD
WITH REMINISCENT SNIFFS.
CUT TO THE SAME RESTAURANT LATER.
THERE ARE NO OTHER CLIENTS APART.
FROM. THE WEDDING PARTY. THE DOOR
TO THE. STREET HAS BEEN CLOSED.
THE PARTY IS NOW DIVIDED INTO GROUPS,
SITIING AT VARIOUS TABLES. A.
WATTER IS SEATED. NEAR THE KITCHEN
ENTRANCE4. SMOKING.
THEY HAVE ALL.
BEEN DRINKING COFFEE.
GIORGIO: AND
REG ARE SMOKING FAT CIGARS.
COLIN
TRELAWNY IS TALKING. TO ESMERALDA
AT ANOTHER. TABLE. JEAN, GORDON AND
KATE. MAKE UP ANOTHER GROUP.
ESMERALDAIS MAKING UP HER FACE WITH
IMPATIENT DETACHMENT AS COLIN
TRELAWNY TALKS: TO. HER..
COLIN (HIS STOMACH STILL BOILING
WITH CHIANTI) I. thought thet was
marvellous----àll.alone in the Forum--
yes, Rome in August!
ESMERALDA':
which is like: saying
you put your head in a hot even for
Basagure! Rome in August is un-


COLIN:. Well we had air condition-
ing of course.
And you could. always
get a breeze up at the top of--
ESMERALDA (CUTTING HIM OFF) Tell
me---I. want the truth---will. he
(NODDING TOWARDS GORDON) pass his
exams?
COLIN (CHIANTI TAKEN BY SURPRISE)
WE CUT TO JEANG, KATE AND GORDON.
JEAN (SECRETIVELY FISHING IN HER BAG)
Here-- (BRINGING OUT AN ENVELOP AND
GIVING IT TO GORDON)-- --take this--
don't let your dad see.
GORDON:
What is it?
JEAN:
You know what it is! I can
tell by your eyes!
It's what mum
gave me to buy a colour TV set--
you have a good honeymoon son-
you'll get two weeks of fun out of
GORBON: But dad's already given
me some.
JEAN: You won't get far on twenty
pounds mate!
KATE (TO JEAN) But you shouldn't
Mrs Page---my father's paid the
hotel in advance--
JEAN: Well, you keep this for pure.
fun then. You've got to be clever
in this world. I used to play my
father some tricks.
(TO KATE) He's
gone tiow. He had more money tucked
away than he ever said. All in the
post office. Anyway (TO GORDON)
you shouldn't touch her money (MEAN-
ING KATE'S)---start independent---
(WITH A WINK. AT KATE) Eh, Kate?
GORDON (FEELING THE ENVLOP IN HIS
POCKET) It seems such a lot.
JEAN: It's the price of a colour TV.
(TO KATE) Your mother's very emotio n
al isn't she? Still I suppose it's
the Italianblood.
KATE: Noe It's just her. Daddy's
not like that. She's always been
the same.
Her friends in Milan call
her Theodora Dusa.


CUT TO REG AND. GIORGIO.
REG IS
HAVING TROUBLE WITH HIS CIGAR.
REG: Yes I've often said to the
wife let's go down to Italy this year
but it always seems to be Spain.
(PUFF AND EXPLOSIVE COUGH)
GORDON IS WATCHING HIM FROM THE
OTHER SIDE OF THE ROOM AND IS
AMUSED.
REG REGISTERS THIS WITH
A SCOWL.
GIORGIO GAZES AT REG IN
A PLACIDLY BLWILDERED WAY. HE
TOUCHES REG'S ARM CONFIDENTIALLY
AND DRAWS NEARER TO HIM.
GIORGIO: MrvPage, my wife and I
were thinking- --how will Caterina
and Gordon live? I believe Gordon
has his exams soon?
REG: That's: right (PFAHH!) He
GIORGIO: What kind of career you
visulaise for the boy, Mr Page?
REG: Hell I mean that's really up
to the boy isn't it? I mean you can
dictate up to a certain point, can't
you, but you've got to leave them
a free hand haven't you?
GIORGIO: You see, we have to think
of Eaterina, only twenty-one, and
there's. the child, I'm afraid I
don't know Gordon. very well.
was.all done rather quickly.
REG: You're telling me.
GIROGIO: Has he a good brain?
REG: Brain? That boy? You ought
to hear him talk. It's marvellous.
Some of the things he comes out with.
1141 this and 1705 that. He's got
it all pat. You can't pull him up
on anything! You're stumped from the
word go where young Gordon's con-
cerned (GIORGIO IS. QUITE LOST NOW),
you're on the floor! (GIORGIO GLANCES
AT THE FLOOR) Of: course I choke him
off somet times, when he gives me a bit
too much lip-- -that's his trouble,
My Ridolifi, he's got too much Iip--
GIORGIO (STRAINING) Lip?
REG (WITH A LAUGH). I tell you, I
could give him a lovely smack. round


the chops sometimes! Oo (RUBBING
THE PALM OF HIS, HAND) ît itches!
Know what I mean?
GIORGIO (STARING DOWN AT REG'S HAND
WITH SOMETHING LIKE FEAR) Oh yes.
REG: But I alwaysi hold back because
I think. that when you've got some-
thing upstairs, you've got a right
to take the mickey, unlike most peopbe,
who tend to be solid from the neck
up! I must say I think your wife's
got all it takes---as far as noose
goes---there are no flies on her!
GIORGIO (SCREWING UP HIS EYES
IN DISTRESS) Flies? on my wife?
CUT TO A HOTEL BEDROOM AT A SEASIDE
RESORT.
GORDON IS IN BED READING
A.L.SMITH'S 'CHURCH AND STATE IN THE
MIDDLE AGES'.
KATE, IN A NIGHT-
DRESS, IS JUST COMING FROM THE BATH-
ROOM, BRUSHING HER. HAIR..
GORDON (LOOKING UP)
Can you hear
the sea?
KATE: I wish it was Italy.
GORDON:
KATE (GAZING AT HIM)
You read much
more than I. do don't you? Yet I
sail through every time.
GORDON:
You're just a mimic.
You pour it in and then you pour it
out.
But I've got a brain..
SHE LAUGHS.
KATE. (SITTING ON THE BEDI No but
honestly what's the trouble?
GORDON: I don't know! I reckon
that if I lived in a place like this
I could work alright. (FLICKING
THROUGH THE PAGES) I've already
read twenty pages. It's when I
start thinking about it as work--
I try and work at it too much---
whereas wi th you it seems easy-.
KATE:
When I work?
GORDON: Yes. I mean you look as
if you're enjoying it. And I make
it a grind.That's how he talks--
dad. Unless: it's a grind it's not
work.
So if you've got a happy
face you're having it cushy. I think
it gets inside you don't you-- -what
your parents think? (KATE SHRUGS)
Do you think we love each other?


KATE:
I don't know. I don't
care.
I mean, we've never had
anybody else have we?.
SILENCE..
GORDON (TOUCHING HER STOMACH) Are
you sure you've got something
there? It's invisible.
KATE: You're looking in the EXaKE
wrong place. It's here (INDICATING
HER EYES)-- -can't you see I'm
having a baby?
GORDON (WITH A LAUGH)
YES!
SILENCE.
KATE: Do you think you'll get
through this time?
HE GAZES AT HER.
GORDON:
Not if I go back
home.
KATE: Gordon---why don't you
come and live with us?
GORDON SHAKES HIS HEAD MUTELY.
CUT TO THE PAGE LIVING ROOM.
IT IS: EVENING.
JEAN IS GETTING
TEA AND REG IS DRYING HIS FACE
AFTER A. WASH.
JEAN (FROM THE KITCHENETTE) I
wish you'd use the bat throom
upstairs!
REG:
Yes, you've said that
before! If it'll keep you quiet
I'I have. another radiator put.
upstairs this week. We can use
some. of that money your mother
gave you for a colour TV.
SILENCE. JEAN IS BUSY WITH THE
REG (EMERGING FROMTHE TOWEL AGAIN)
Did you put it in the post office?
JEAN: Yes.
REG: Well that's funny, I was.
in there Saturday morning and--
JEAN (SCREAMING) Now for Christ
sake get those, overalls: off and
sitdown to your tea!
REG. (LEAVING) I'm never late
for plaice and chips!


HE TRIPS OUT OE' THE ROOM PLAY-
FULLY BUT THEN PUTS HIS. HEAD BACKMIN.
REG (IN A LOW VOICE) Is he in then?
JEAN (ALSO LOW) What?
REG: His light's on.
Did, he
come back in?
JEAN: He must have done then.
REG: It's not right, I don't care:
what you say---a kid of that age
married, only just out of school!
JEAN: We should have. put our foot
down. We were pushed into that
nicely.
I'd give her Esmeralda
if I was her old man!
REG: You'd better put another
couple of fillets on.
JEAN: All right---you look after
your business and I'll look after
mine---now get a. decent shirt on!
HE LEAVES.
She wanders back into
the kitchenette.
JEAN: 'Couple of fillets'.
CUT TO GORDON'S BEDROOM. HE IS
TRYING TO TAKE NOTES FROM A BOOK.
HÉ CANNOT CONCENTRATE. HE STARTS
CRYING TO HIMSELF.
JEAN (VO) Gordon?
GORDON: Yes?
JEAN (VO) I've got a nice piece of
fried plaice down here for you!
GORDON: OK I'll be down.
JEAN (VO) Are you all right?
SHE HAS HEARD SOMETHING IN HIS
VOICE AND IS COMING UPSTAIRS.
HE TRIES TO HIDE HIS STATE BEFORE
SHE COMES IN. JEAN PEEPS ROUND
THE DOOR..
JEAN: Here, you've been crying.
Has that woman been playing you. up
again?
REG (BEHIND HER) What's wrong with
him?
REG APPEARS TOO.
GORDON (IN TEARS) Iban't concentrate!
It's no good!


JEAN GOES TO THE BED AND DRAWS HIS
HEAD TOWARDS HER.
JEAN:
There, don'tbyou mind about
that!
Exams aren't everything.
If you worried a bit less: you might
be all. right.
REG: Esmeralda hasn't been at it
again has she?
GORDON: No.
REG: You tell her where to stuff
it when she starts leading off again.
Tell her., just leave me alone Mrs
Ridolifi, because it's me. taking the
exams. not you.
GORDON: I wish you'd say her name
right.
It's Mrs Ridolfi.
JEAN: Anyway I've cooked a lovely
bit of fish, duck.. Come on. Then
we 'l1 go down and have a drink. And
try and forget our worries eh?
CUT TO REG, GORDON AND JEAN AT THE
PUB DOWN THE ROAD. JEAN AND GORDON
ARE JUST ABOUT TO SIT DOWN, AND REG
IS ABOUT TO GO TO THE BAR TO ORDER.
JEAN: I think I'll have a gin and
tonic.
REG:
What's yours, son?
GORDON: Glass of red winerplease.
JEAN:
Getting quite Italian eh?
REG GOES TO THE BAR.
JEAN: :
Where's Kate these days?
GORDON:
She's got her finals next
week.
JEAN: I wonder you go round there
at all.
You seem to have lost
your spirit son---you used to give
your dad a bit of lip but now--
GORDON: I told you, she's got her
exams.
JEAN (AS REG COMES WITH THE DRINKS)
You should never have got married--
a couple of kids like you! Honestly,
I don't know how that Ésmeralda did
it---she just wound us round her little
finger! And this bloke (MEANING
REG) was the first to say ye.s.


REG (LAYING DOWN THE DRINKS)
What's that?
JEAN:
Nothing.
(TO GORDON)
You. ought to get yourself digs at
least.
Just you and her. It's
wrong not living together.
GORDON:
Where do I. get the money?
JEAN: Oh we might be able to cough
up something. I can go back to the
REG: You're not going back to that
GORDON DOWNS HIS GLASS. IN ONE GO.
JEAN (TO REG) Are you going to let
her look down her nose. at him for' the
rest of his life then? Anyway I
enjoyed that job at the Co-op.
REG (TO GORDON) Blimey, that was
quick wasn't it?
JEAN: Oh. go on! Let him enjoy
himself!
CUT TO GORDON'S BEDROOM. HE PUSHES.
OPEN THE DOOR UNSTEADILY, HAVING HAD
SEVERAL GLASSES OF WINE. HE LOOKS
ROUND AT HIS BOOKS. HE MARCHES TO
THE BED AND CLOSES, THEM ALL. HE
PACKS THEM RESOLUTELY INTO PILES
AND STACKS THEM ON THE CHEST OF
DRAWERS. HE THEOWS. AWAY HIS BOOK
OF NOTES. HE LEAVES. THE ROOM.
CUT TOL GIORGIO RIDOLFI'S OFFICE.
HE IS CLEARLY IN THE TOURIST BUSINESS.
THERE ARE POSTERS. ROUND. THE WALL
ADVERTISING ITALY. HE IS WORKING
AT HIS DESK IN HIS SHIRTSLEEVES.
THE INTERCOM BUZZES.
GIORGIO (PRESSING THE CONTACT) Si?
SECRETARY. (VO) cgeun signore, un
giovanotto---dice/che Le conosce-
GIORGIO (STILL ATTENDING TO HIS
WORK) Come si chiama?
SECRETARY (VO) Gordon Page.
GIORGIO: Ah---è il mio genero-- puo
st mandarlo a me!
SEVRETARY (VO) Va bene.
GIORGIO GOES ON WORKING.
THE DOOR
OPENS AND THE' SECRETARY USHERS IN
GORDON..
GIORGIO GETS UP AND GOES
ROUND HIS DESK. TO SHAKE HANDS AFFECT-
IONATELY..


GIORGIO (SHOWING HIH TO A CHAIR)
Here. Such a sad face.
GORDON (WITH A SHRUG) Ohf
GIORGIO (PULLING UP ANOTHER CHAIR
CLOSE TO HIM) You lunch with me?
GORDON:
Oh thanks.
GIORGIO:
Any trouble?
GORDON: I'm not trying for the
university any more. I thought
I'd get a job. I wondered if you
could help me.
GIRGIO GAZES AT HIM FOR SOME TIME.
GIORGIO: Why you give up?
GORDON: I know it's no good.
GIORGIO: Are you sure?
GORDON: Yes.
GIORGIO GOES TO THE DESK AND. TAKES
UP A PHONE. STILL GAZING AT GORDON
HE DIALS A NUMBER. ESMERALDA
ANSWERS AT THE OTHER END.
ESMERALDA (VO) Pronto?
GIORGIO: E Giorgio. Viené qui
subito. Tratta di Gordon.
ESMERALDA (VO) Ch'è successo?
GIORGIO: Niente. Vieni qui!
ESMERALDA (VO) Vengo subito!
GIORGIO (AS HE PUTS THE PHONE
DOWN AGAIN) My wife's coming right
now.
CUT TO ESMERALDA. PUFFINGLY CLIMB-
ING CEMENT STAIRS.
SHE REACHES
THE LITTLE CIOAKROOM OUTSIDE HER
CLASS. THERE ARE A NUMBER OF HER
PUPILS STANDING AROUND.
ESMERALDA (TO ANY OF THEM) Have you
seen Mr Wainwright?
PUPIL 1: He's here (INDICATING THE
CLASSROOM).
SHE PASSES THROUGH TO THE CLASSROOM.
HERE ARTHUR. WAINWRIGHT, A SHAGGY
MIDDLE-AGED TEACHER, IS DRINKING A
CUP-OF TEA..
WAINWRIGHT: Hullo Mrs Ridolfi.
ESMERALDA: My. sonrin-lay must
learn Italian right away!


WAINWRIGHT STARES AT HER FOR A
MOMENT IN SURPRISE.
MAINWRIGHT: You mean to say that
pretty daughter of yours got married?
I thought you had her all lined. up
for mef
ESMERALDA (SOARING PAST HIS FACET-
IOUSNESS) Could he come to my
Italian class?
WAINWRIGHT: Well. of course he could,
Mrs Ridolfi, that's for you to day.
ESMERALDA:
But it's not up to me
to pay---that's what I want to avoid!
WAINWRIGHT (WITH A SMILE) Ah!
ESMERALDA:
Couldn't he take some
of the English classes for foreign
students, the elementary ones, and
make it up that way?
WAINWRIGHT: Well you are quick on
the drawer!
We're butter in your
fingers, aren't we, Mrs Ridolfi, eh?
Has he got his A levels?
ESMERALDA: Oh yes, one or two, and
a few O levels too.
All the levels:
except a level head!
CUT TO A CORRIDOR. IN KATE'S COLLEGE.
SHE IS JUST LEAVING THE LIBRARY,
CARRYING A BREEFCASE FAT WITH BOOKS.
SHE IS BEGINNING TO SHOW SIGNS. OF
PREGNANCY.. SHE HURRIES ALONE.
SOMEONE CALLS HER. FROM BEHIND. IT
IS COLIN TRELAWNY. SHE TURNS.
COLIN (APPROACHING)
Mrs Page!
KATE: Hullo. I'm not used to, being
called. that.
TRELAWNY: I've been looking for
you everywhere. I got an hour off
from school..
KATE (DARKENING) It's about Gordon?
TRELAUNY: You know he wants to give
up and find a job don't you?
KATE: What?
TRELAWNY: He didn't tell. you?
KATE: No!
TRELAWNY: Your father's. found him
a job.


KATE (OUTRAGED) My father:!
TRELAWNY: You know, it's broken
my heart.
It seems mad---just a
couple of A levels and--
You know
he nearly got a history - place at
Cambridge last year don't you?
They wrote me a special letter about
him.
BURST IN WITH THE SOUNDS OF A
FOOTBALL. MATCH AND CUT TO. THE PAGE
LIVING ROOM. WHERE REG IS WATCHING
AN INTERNATIONAL GAME ON TV. JEAN
IS AT HIS SIDE EATING CHOCOLATES.
THE TV FLICKERS IN THEIR FACES.
REG: Go on! Go on! Oh Blimey!
Honest, he thinks you play with your
hands, that feller.
What's his.
JEAN SHRUGS AND GOES ON EATING.
REG: : He always does that---he--
A. RING AT THE FRONT-DOOR BELL.
JEAN: That must be Gordon. If he
forgets. his key again I'll tie it
round his bloody neck. (GETTING UP
SLOWLY)
REG: Oh! (DANCING IN HIS SEAT)
YOU cockeyed ponce---I
THE BELL RINGS AGAIN.
JEAN (AS SHE REACHES THE DOOR,
TURNING BACK) And don't use that
word!
REG (GLUED TO THE SEAT) Cord love
old Ireland-- -fidgetarsing about
between goalposts!
JEAN (VO) Oh Hullo Kate.
Good
evening Mr Trelawny, this is a
nice surprise.
REG COCKS AN EAR. HE HUMPS UP,
TIGHTENS HIS TROUSERS WHICH WERE
LOOSE, DIVES TO THE TV SET AND
SWITCHES IT OFE.
JEAN (VO) Reggy?
REG (STANDING AT THE READY) Yes
dear?
JEAN (VO) It's Kate and Mr
Trelawny.
REG: Oh that's nice!
KATE AND COLIN TRELAWNY COME IN,


FOLLOWED BY JEAN.
JEAN: Well how are you keeping
Kate?
KATE: I'm fine, thank you.
JEAN (WITH A GLANCE AT KATE'S.
TUMMY) That's right.
REG: Make you. self comfortable
Mr Trelawny (AS THEY ALL SIT DOWN).
TRELAWNY: Well I'll cut a long story
short by saying we've come about
Gordon.
JEAN: What's up with Gordon?
TRELAWNY: He won't be going to
the university after all.
REG: Since when?
TRELAWNY: So you don't know either?
REG: Not us..
TRELAWITY: Well he came to me
yesterdaybwith all his books. He
said Kate' 's father had offered. him
a job. I asked Kate about it
and she said she didn't know. He
didn't have a word with you before-
hand?
JEAN:What sort of a job would that
be then?
KATE: Fy father works in a tourist
company and he wants Gordon to be
one of his couriers--
JEAN: Oh! That sounds. nice!
REG: What would the work consist
of exactly, looking after charabanc
loads I expect, seeing to the fun
and games side, we had acourier in
Spain, do you remember Jean, he was
a scream! He put that thing in
our bed--
JEAN: Qh yes!
REG (TO TRELAUNY)
You: know, they're
little bits of plastic got up to
look like dog's busnness. Talk
about laugh!
JEAN: I didn't laugh, not when I
saw it. And. I can't see Gordon


playing that sort of joke.
TRELAWNY: I just thought it, was a
terrible tragedy him giving up the
university. He's got just the
sort of mind you need. I thought
you might be able to help. He's
still. living at home after all.
He's not with us at school any
more but I'm prepared to go on
with the private coaching.
REG:. And what does: his wife say about
KATE: I don't mind him having a job.
But I.don't think he'd be happy.
I. mean he won't be doing what he
wantss to doe.
JEAN: Yes but this was his, own
decision wasn't it? And if it
brings him a good job----I mean
he obviously wasn't satisfied with
the way his life was going was he?
REG (TO KATE) You and Gordon are
thelimit, honestly. Aren't you: in
contact?
JEAN: All right Reg..
KATE: The thing is I've got my
finals---before the child comes
along--
REG: I can see why he wants to
get a job. Can't you Kate? He
wants to look after his wife and
child.. It stands to reason.
JEAN (TO KATE, PROUDLY) He went
straight to your dad then?
KATE: Yes.
JEAN: Where would this currying
be then?
KATE: In italy.
KATE: Dad wants him to take charge
of a group of hotels eventually,
when he knows. enough Italian.
JEAN QWITH A LAUGH) Well, we've
got our holidays mapped out for us
then! No more Majorca, and
Brighton in the lean years, eh Reg?
REG STROKES HIS CHIN, SEEING HER


POINT WITH RELISH BUT NOT DARING.
TO SHOW. IT..
CUT TO ESMERALDA'S LANGUAGE CLASS.
SHE AND GORDON ARE THE ONLY ONES
THERE..
ESMERALDA: So---what were we saying
at the beginning? Io ho dieci
sterline da spendere-- -'I have ten
pounds to spend'. How much have I
to spend?
GORDON: Ten..
ESMERALDA (ICILY) In Italian
please.
GORDON: Er--
ESMERALDE: Dieci.
And what is
the currency, of which I have. ten
to spend?
GORDON: : Er--
ESMERALDA: Sterlint- -pounds.
AND who has ten pounds. to spend?
GORDON: Er-
ESMERALDE: Io. "I' have.
Not
GORDON: Du.
ESMERALDA: 'Du', Gordon, is
German. He
speaking Italian.
(GAZING AT HtTe Gordon, what are
you thinking about all the time?
HE GAZES BACK AT HER.
GORDON: Mediaeval history.
CUT TO THE HOTEL BEDROOM WHERE
KATE. AND GORDON HONEYMOONED.
GORDON IS IN BED AS BEFORE, AND
AGAIN HE IS READING 'CHURCH AND
STATE IN THE MIDDLE AGES'. KATE
DRIFTS IN EROM THE BEDROOM.
SHE IS GETTING UNDRESSED.
KATE: You've got a fix on the
middle ages haven't you?
GORDON: Well, life was simpler
then.
KATE: People lived like dogs.
GORDON: Some did. Whereas younlike
factories and fast roads, don't
you?
KATE: Yes.


GORDON: Why?
KATE:
Because I'm Italian. We
had the. middle ages too long.
GORDON (TAKING A LETTER FROM THE
BACK OF HIS BOOK) Mr Trelawny
wrote me a letter. Like to have
a look?.
SHE TAKES THE LETTER.
KATE. (READING IT)
What papers is
he talking about? Have you been
sending him essays?
GORDON: Yes.
KATE (WITH A LAUGH) But you've. given
it all up!
You are a goof! I
mean you're: not at school or
university or even half way between
the two!
GORDON: I. know, that's what he
says.
KATE (READING) 'What's the use
Gordon? These papers are first
-class but who's going to read them
apart from. me?' Well there you.
are. (GAZING AT HIM) Do you
want to try for Sussex, one last
shot?
Why not Gordon?
GORDON: It'd be the same. The
minute I know. I've got to do it I
stop enjoying it. I mean I think
you need freedom to think. I don 't
know how: all these people do it--- -
think to ordert I have to think
when I. feel like itf
KATE: Anyway, you're here to
learn Italian from me. That's the
idea of sending us here isn't it?
And ever since you got here you've
had your head stuck in that book---
(playfully trying to wrestle the
book away from him).
THEY LAUGH, STRUGGLE, KISS.
GORDON: : We'll have a lesson later.
You can teach me the parts af the
body.
KATE (LYING ON THE BED) I's that
honestly what you've been doing,
writing essays?
GORDON: Yes..
KATE: But why?


GORDON: Bexause it's useless.
(SHE LAUGHS AGAIN) If somebody
came along and said do it because
it'll bring you in a bit of money
I couldn't. But if the work isn't
for something I can get interested.
Idon't feel anybody breathing down
my neck. I'm just not intesrested
in exams, I'm interested in history,
the people---what they did. And.
that's. supposed to be wrong! You're
supposed to learn history to get a
job. Well, that's. not being inter-
ested' in history, it's being inter-
ested in a job. Do you see what
I mean? The same with Italian.
I could learn Italian if it wasn't
going to get me anywhere. I'm
interested in Italian, not in get-
ting somewhere with it. And all
those people who go to your mother's
class aren't interested in Italian,
they just want to make some money.
And she blames me for not learning
it like they
like a lot of
parrots. I
know, people are
ddo1t
so daft nowadays, they say make some
money and then they tell you to
read a book. or learn a language.
And they don't have anything to do
with each other!
KATE: You ought to explain that
to mum.
GORDON: Yes but then it'd be
useful. So I couldn't. I can
only explain it to you because it's
useless. I mean, you believe in
me anyway.
So there's no point in.
telling you. That's why I tell you.
CUT TO THE PAGE LIVING ROOM. IT
IS EVENING.
GORDON IS ALONE.
HE IS AT THE TABLE WITH BOOKS BEFORE
HIM, WRITING BUSILY.
THERE IS A
NOISE AT THE FRONT DOOR. HE STOPS.
IT IS REG AND JEAN. HE PUTS THE
PEN DOWN AND LEANS BACK. THERE IS
THE SOUND. OF STAMPING FEET ON THE
MAT, AND WHEWING AND. BLOWING SOUNDS.
REG (VO) Blimey, I reckon it's
going to snow tonight.
REG AND JEAN COHE IN, TAKING THEIR.
COATS OFF.
JEAN: Hullo, you back? I thought
you was seeing Kate tonight.
REG. SIMPLY GIVES GORDON A GLANCE
AND GOES QUTSIDE TO HANG HIS COAT
REG (TO JEAN) What about a cup of


tea?
JEAN: All right, let me get inside
the. door!
REG (WITH A LOOK AT GORDON'S BOOKS)
Turning this place into your study
then?
GORDON: I'll go' upstairs.
REG: Listen, we had Madam Ridolifi
here last night.. She said you're
not learning Italian.
She says
you don't go to her classes any
more.
She says you was sacked
from teaching English to foreign
students the first day---she said
you. talked about the middle ages
all the time and they didn't under-
stand a blime word!
You're the
limit aren't you? I reckon the idea
of bringing you into the world was
to break my heart---I can't see any
other reason! You're spending me
out of house and home---I can't go
on forking out---and I'm not having
your mother working at the Co-op
JEAN (GETTING THE TEA) All right
all right!
REG (TURNING ON HER) Well, you tell
me what to do then---is he going to
stay with us: all his life? And what
about his kid? He s never going to
see the kid at this rate. His kid'll
be grown. up and earning good money,
and he'll be sitting at grandad's
writing essays! And Madam Ridolifi
told me all about Kate too.
She
said she passed all. her e.xams with
flying colours and she's going to
find a decent job! Here---CLOWER-
ING HIS HEAD TO GORDON'S LEVEL) I
reckon you're soft in the head!
That's what I reckon!
JEAN: All right all. right!
REG (SITTING IN HIS CHAIR. AND
BEGINNING TO TAKE OFF HIS SHOES.)
A week at rhe sea to learn Italian!
Double room and bath, meals all
paid for! Lucky Esmeralda's got the
money to do it because I couldn't.
Not that you did learn any Italian,
even from your own wife.
GORDON: Ilearned the parts of
the body.
REG: : Yes I know you blinkingly
well did! She: told me! What are


you going to do in Italy then,
when you're running hotels- --tell
the manager-what a big arse he's
got!
'Parts of the body'!
You
make me sick!
CUT TO A HOSPITAL WAITING ROOM AS
THE CRY OF A NEWBORN INFANT COMES
OVER. ESMERALDA, GIORGIO, REG AND
JEAN ARE WAITING ANXIOUSLY. A
NURSE APPEARS AT THE DOOR AND SMILES
AT THEM.
NURSE (QUIETLY) It's a boy. Five
and a half pounds.
ESMERALDA: Un figlio! (JUMPING UP
AND GOING TO THE NURSE)
Can we see
NURSE:
Not quite yet.
I'll
let you know.
THE. NURSE LEAVES.
ESMERALDA GOES
TO JEAN AND KISSES HER ON BOTH
CHEEKS.
JEAN (EMBARRASSED)
Five and a half
pounds eh?
GIORGIO SHAKES HANDS WITH REG.
ESMERALADA (STILL HOLDING JEAN CLOSE)
And the child's father?
JEAN: Eell I don't know I'm sure!
Reg---didn't he say he was on his
way? (AS REG LCOKS BEWILDERED)
Gordon!
REG:
Isn't he here then? I thought
he was inside with Kate.
ESMERALDA : Oh my God he's deserted
hent
GIORGIO:
Ma Esmeralda!
ESMERALDA: It happened to your
cousin---in Bari---on the day of
the birth---he was never seen again!
REG: He said he was coming.
mean, he's absent-minded but it's
not like Gordon to be absent from a
birth is it Jean?
ESMERALDE: You have such affunny
son Mrs Page. Of course he's very
dear to us both.
And Kate adores
him.. Do you know what he told


me?---he says that if people ask
him to think about one thing he
starts thinking about the opposite,
without meaning to. So he's
probably gone to the cemetery, as
this is a birth!
And my daughter
has a lifetime of Gordon in front
of her---think of that!
JEAN:
Well I'm sure he's some-
where!
ESMERALDA (ICILY) I never doubted
that.
THE DOOR BURSTS OPEN AND GORDON COMES
GORDON: It's aboyf Five and a
half pounds!
REG: Yes we've just heard son.
GORDON: I've seen it all on
television!
ESMERALDA : 0 Dio!
REG : You what?
GORDON: With some staudents.
It's a closed circuit television.
The matron let me. I think women
are marvellous! I never knew
women were like that! People fon't
realise---it's marvellous giving
birth---I think women are marvellous!
There isn't one of them isn't some-
body big and important, do you see
what.I. mean?---I mean we can(t do
anything like that, men can't!
REG: OK,: son.
ESMERALDA. (PUTTING. HER ARMS ROUND
GORDON WITH A LAUGH) You didn't
think about something else then,
while she was giving birth? You
didn't think about old men, seeing
a newborn baby?
GORDON (NOT UNDERSTANDING) No,
ESMERALDA. (GIVING HIM A KISS) So
my darling you can go on. having
babies. for the rest of your life--
then people will forgive you every-
thing, at least Italians willl
CUT TO THE PAGE LIVING ROOM.
GORDON IS. SITTING. AT THE TABLE:
AGAIN WITH BOOKS BEFORE, HIM.
SWE PAN ROUND TO. FIND: KATE ON THE
OTHER. SIDE, WATCHING HIM IN SILENCE.


KATE: I'd love it here.
It's
so peaveful.. You're lucky being
born in a working family.
GORDON: I know but---it's no good,
for this sort of thing (NODDING TOWARDS
HIS BOOKS).
At least it would be
if money wasn't behind everything---
KATE:
So it in the other class---
only worse.
GORDON: Yes but you can't get
roundit here, it's in the pavements,
it sort of glitters up at you.
Everybody seems to be thinking inside
little schedules---they go out in
the morning and they all come back
at night, and it feels like a cemetery
in the day.
They've. forgotten how
to live.
KATE: So why go on doing that
(INDICATING HIS BOOKS)?
GORDON: Well I can't any more-
it doesn't work---I just put the
books here so as not just to stare
into space: and realise I'm a spare,
I've got no job and--
KATE:
Gordon, don't make mg
unhappy!. Come and live with us,
you know you'd love to be with the
baby---mum's all right now, she keeps
on asking about you, she's proud
of you, it's an Italian thing, you've
got a position now as a father!
GO DON: Why don't you divorce me?
KATE:
Divorce! (SHE LAUGHS) It's
not in my blood.
Italians stand
anything once they've got a child.
Even things like you!
HD SMILES..
KATE:
You seem about a hundred
years. older since the baby.
GORDON: I feel it.
KATE:
Gordon, I've been offered
job. At a cartographer's.
Eujob good money. I don't mind
working while you stay at home and
read.
You could even try for a
place again, you could take your
time. My tutor was saying they
like people to come up when they're
about twenty-three, because they"re
more mature. Please Gordon---I


d'on't feel good living separate
any more!. (BEGINNING TO CRY)
Dad wants you with us too! Italian
families: are diffent! They like to
be together! They don't think
anything of a man being idle, if
that's really his nature...
And if
he's a father...
Gordon!
SHE GOES OVER TO HIM.
GORDON: If I lived at your place.
I'd feel even more unreal.
KATE: (WITH ESMERALDA'S ANGER FOR A.
MOMENT) What does it matter what
you feel? You'd be with. your own
child!
GORDON: Yes, I. know. Feelings
don't matter. But-- --(WITH A SHRUG).
I wouldn't know how to get away from
them, not if I had nothing to do all
day!
KATE:
But you say you love reading!
and writing papers for Trelawny!
GORDON:
And he sends them back!
Because it doesn't lead anywhere.
That's what I hear in my brain alll
the time when I'm reading---it's not
leading anywhere!
KATE: Then that makes you like
your father!
It means you agree
with himl---that life's got to be
a grind before it's real! Look: at
you sitting there, grinding at your
books when you want to be outside
with me or playing with the baby!
You're the one who wants. it to lead
somewhere---why2 If you're happy
just reading why don't you
instead of thinking where 1d9 s going
to lead? You say you don't want
to think about exams and jobs and
money all the time, well then, come
and live with us, and you can read
all day, and you can play with the
baby when you don't wantbto read!
You could do lots of things---you
might want to do an external course-
you, might start liking exams! You
don't.know how you'd change in a
different place!
(WITH A SIGH)
Sometimes youiseem stupid Gordon.
And it's only because you dream.
And you worry. And I know you'd
hate yourself. if you came to live
with us...
GORDON: Yes I would. Seeing you
and your mum and dad all go out in
the morning, and leave me and the
baby behind---I can imagine how it'd
make me. feel.


KATE (SLUMPING DOWN IN A CHAIR
AGAIN) So there's no solution.
No job, no university, no reading
even.. Just nothing.
GORDON: No I don't say that.
KATE: Well tell me what there is
then?, You leave school and say
you're going to get a job, and you
ask dad for a job and he offers you
one, and then you can't learn Italian,
and now you can't even read either--
because it doesn't lead anywhere.
Yet you're supposed to. believe in
things not leading anywhere (PUTTING
HER HAND TO HER HEAD IN CONFUSION)...
GORDON: I do believe in things
not leading anywhere. I mean a man
should just be interested in his.
subjeçt and he shouldn' 't think of
themoney that comes out of, it.
You've got to have thinkers. That's
the trouble nowadays, there's no
one to think, there are only people
scrambling and fighting each other
for money, and they use whatever
they've got for the fight---and I'm
not going to use all this (NODDING
TOWARDS THE BOOKS) for fighting.
I'd rather work with my hands.
You've got to have thinkers. That's
the trouble today. Everything's
going to get smashed up because of
that. There' 's no one allowed to
sit and think-things out. He's
always somebody* else's slave.
Working for somebody else's idea.
So he can't think straight in the
end. That's what I think. Some-
body's got to stop and say, I won't
do it. Otherwise everything gets
smashed up. I mean, everybody's
blind. Things just happen nowadays.
Nobody's in charge Kate, you see,
because there's nobody allowed. to
think things out.. One chap's a.
specialist in flat feet, another
one does urine tests, somebody else
makes. precision instruments. And
they've all got their noses down and
can't see the whole picture, they
can't ak themselves what's it all
for because then if they didn't want
to do it they'a starve, so every-
body's helping to smash the world
up, and I'm not going to.
KATE: Don't then. I don't want
you to. I agree. with what you say.
So. come and live with us. But you
couldn't. You'd hate yourself!
Why? Lt means you don't really
believe in what you're saying!


GORDON:
It means my upbringing's
got under my skin. Yes, I agree. there.
KATE: So why not get away?
GORDON:
And sit and hate myself?
KATE (CRYING SILENTLY) Gordon...
GORDON:
Listen, I'll find a place
for us to live. That's the best answer
of the lot isn't it?
KATE (NODDING AND TRYING TO SMILE) Yes!
CUT TO THE PAGE LIVING ROOM IN THE
EARLY MORNING. JEAN IS GETTING BREAK-
FAST. THE TABIE IS LAID FOR THREE.
JEAN (CALLING) Reg! It's past
eight,, come on!
REG (VO) I'll be there!
JEAN (CALLING) Gordon!
NO REPLY. REG COMES IN IN HIS OVERALLS.
REG: I smell eggs and bacon!
JEAN: And tomatoes. And fried bread.
REG: You're spoiling me. A Sunday
breakfast every day! (SITTING DOWN)
But don't think you can fool me, my
girl.
You're doing it to tickle his
appetite aren't you? (AS SHE PUTS
A STEAMING PLATE BEFORE HIM) That's
it, a nice big helping for dad!
JEAN: Grandad you mean.
REG: Don't remind me. (TUCKING IN)
I bet he don 't eat it Bust the same
JEAN (IN THE KITCHENETTE) I was think-
ing last'night, she 's turned out ever
such a good little mother hasn't she?
Did you see the way she did that
nappy?
REG: She starts work next month then.
JEAN:
Yes.
REG: I don't knowl---his wife earning
and
JEAN: Well it's no good harping on it!
GORDON COFES IN.
REG:
Hullo mate.


GORDON:
Morning.
JEAN: I was saying about Kate,
she looks as if she 's been pinning
up nappies all her life.
GORDON (SITTING DOWN), Italian
blood.
REG (DRINKING HIS TEA) That would
have been the life eh?---if that
hotel-idea had worked out and you'd
have been sent out there to look
after a whole ne twork.
Still, dreams!
They can't stop us having them. can
they mate?
GORDON:
JEAN BRINGS GORDON'S BREAKFAST.
GORDON (TO REG) I was going to
ask you something.
REG:
What?
GORDON:
I've got to find a place
for me and Kate to live.
REG:: Yes?
GORDON:
Can you fix me up with a
job down at the Electricity Board?
I mean for a bit? I mean, I know.
how to do the work, I've watched
you at it all my life.
JEAN STANDS GAZING AT HIM.
REG (ABASHED). Well,, I. don't know
how they stand for giving jobs.
GORDON: I. mean, what about it?
REG: I could have a bash, with the
personnel manager.
JEAN:
Yes but Gordon--
GORDON: Oh don't make it bad
please! I've got to do it!
REG (GETTING UP). Here, son, you
don 'tvhave to get worked up about
it (PUTTING HIS HAND ON GORDON'S
SHOULDER)E You're all right. You're
OK. I'll see what I can do.
GORDON: It's only for a bit.
REG: Of course it is. You'll
make it some day.
You don't need


a university education for what
you're after.
GORDON: Yes but---(IOGKING UP AT
HIM) what am I after?
REG (WALKING AWAY BACK TO HIS BREAK-
FAST, WITH A SHRUG) A new kind of
man, I. suppose!
JEAN:
Come on, eat your breakfast
GORDON LOOKS DOWN AT HIS BREAKFAST
AND THEN BEGINS EATING WITHOUT APP-
ETITE AS THE TITLES COME: UP.


THE UNEXPECTED WEDDING
MAURICE ROWDON


KATE: I'd. love it here.
so peaceful.. You're lucky being
born in the working class.
GORDON: 'Working class'! Doesn't
exist any more. There's money behind
everything---
KATE: So there is in the other
class---only worse.
GORDON: Yes but you can't get
round it here, it's in the pavements,
it sort of glitters up at you.
Everybody seems to be thinking inside
little schedules--- --theybgo out in
the morning and they all come back
at night, and it feels like a
cemetery in the day. They've
forgotten how to live.
KATE: So why go on doing that
(INDICATING, HIS BOOKS)?.
GORDON: Well I can't any more-
it doesn't work---I just put the books
here so as not just to stare into
space and realise I'm a spare,
I've got no. job and--
(LOOKING
AT HER EARNESTLY.) Why don't you.
divorce me?
KATE (WITH A LAUGH) It's not
in my blood!
Italians stand
anything once. they've got a child.
Even things like you!
HE SMILES.
KATE: You seem about a hundred
years older since the baby.
GORDON: I feel it.
KATE: I've been offered. a job..
At a cartographer's. I've been
frightened to tell you. (THEY GAZE
AT EACH OTHER IN SILENCE) It's
good money.
I don' 't mind working
while you stay at home and read.
You could even try for a place
again, you could take: your time.
My tutorwas saying they like.
people to come up when they're
about twenty-three, because they're
more mature. Please Gordon, I


CHARACTERS
REGINALD PAGE
JEAN PAGE
GORDON PAGE
KATE RIDOLFI
ESMERALDA RIDOLFI
GIORGIO RIDOLFI
COLIN TRELAWNY
REGISTRAR
GINO
ARTHUR WAINWRIGHT
LANGUAGE-CLASS PUPILS, SECRETARY,
NURSE, RESTAURANT GUESTS ETC.


THE KITCHENETTE OF A SMALL S.W.
LONDON HOUSE.
JEAN PAGE, IN HER
EARLY FORTIES, IS GETTING BREAKFAST
AS THE TITLES COME UP. SHE PUTS
TEA IN THE POT, POURS.
THE TOAST
POPS UP IN THE RACK.
SHE WALKS
QUICKLY NEXT DOOR TO THE LIVING
ROOM, WHERE THE TABLE IS LAID FOR
THREE. AT TWO OF THE PLACES
THERE IS A BOILED EGG, KEEPING WARM
UNDER EGG COVERS MARKÉD 'REG' AND
'JEAN'. JEAN GLANCES OUT OF THE
WINDOW, WATCHES THE WEATHER FOR A
MOMENT.
THERE IS THE SOUND OF A
FACTORY HOOTER OUTSIDE.
JEAN (CALLING)
Reg! Come on!
(AS SHE PUTS THE TEAPOT DOWN AND
THEN THE COSY ON IT) Reg!
REG (VO) All right, give me a chance!
REG, ALSO IN HIS EARLY FORTIES,
COMÉS BUSTLING IN IN HIS OVERALLS,
RUBBING HIS HANDS TOGETHER.
REG:
Blimey it's nippy. (SITTING
DOUN) That thermostat all right?
JEAN: You've got thermostat on
the brain. It's seventy-odd---
what more do you want?
REG (CRACKING HIS EGG) Where's
our
son---preparing for a
hard cang, work?
JEAN (ALSOI.SITTING DOWN) I've
given up calling him of a morning.
REG: Did I hear 'em talking down
here last night, round about two?
Him and young Kate? Of course,
if you've got no work it makes no
odds when you come in at night.
JEAN: Oh leave the boy alone.
REG:
kords!
Good God, that boy
gets through some words in a day!
Who the devil does he get it from?


GORDON:
You agree with them don't
you?
KATE:
Who?
GORDON: Your mum and dad. That
we shoulnd't be alone toge ther.
It's funny, y u're English but you're
not like Pam and Bren and that girl
from Swansea. You want to keep
your virginity.
KATE:
You should go with them in
that case.
GORDON:
They're not in the same
class. Say somet thing real nice---
in Italian, go on.
KATE: Ti voglio bene.
MEANING 'I LOVE YOU': SHE SUBSIDES
ON TOTHE TABLE AND HE SOON FINDS
HIMSELF LYING ON TOP OF HER.
GORDON (IN A WHISPER) Am I a schooll-
boy?
KATE SHAKES HER HEAD.
KATE:
You're heautiful.
beautiful man.
THEY BEGIN MAKING LOVE.
CUT BACK TO THE PAGE LIVING ROOM.
REG AND JEAN HAVE BEEN JOINED AT
BREAKFAST BY GORDON, WHO IS EATING
TOAST WITHOUT MUCH APPEARANCE OF
APPETITE.
REG:
Yes but what I mean is you
can have a lay-in when you want to,
not like other people who go out on
a regular job. That's all I'm say-
ing. I mean I know you study but
it's not work like I mean it.
GORDON: Oh I see. So why do you
want me to_go to the university?
REG: I haven't said a blime word
about it. All I know is what your
teachers say---so I say,. all right,
let him have a go, let him try for
the university and then maybe he'll
get a't better job than his dad.
All parents want to see their sons
better than theirselves. I don't
want you pulling up floorboarde and
flicking switches all your life,
stands to reason.
GORDON:
If your work's no good
why do you do it?


REG:
I've got to do something
haven't I?
GORDON:
Why?
REG:
How would you and mum keep
alive?
GORDON:
You needn't have married.
REG (WITH A LAUGH) Well I needn't
have been born come to that!
GORDON:
I just don't get it.
You're supposed to be marvellous
because you' 've got a job, and I'd
supposed to be a layabout because
I read' books, yet you don't want me
to do your work---you don't want me
to be marvellous like you!
JEAN (TICKLED)
That's it Gordon!
REG: No I'm not saying that.
I'm just saying you could get it
easier than what I did maybe.
GORDON: Oh I seel We're all out
for an easy time. That's the idea
of going to the university is it?
I still don't get itl I mean you
must get some kick out of being an
electrician, btherwise it's not worth
being allivel
REG:
Well I suppose I do get some.
Otherwise I wouldn't do it.
GORDON: So you're doing what you
want to do! Like I said!
REG:
Yes but if I had a cushier
job with a bit more money I'd be
happier.
GORDON:
The penny's dropped!
I've got a cushy job waiting for me,
that's why,I want to go to the unive I-
sity! It's going to be doad easy!
I get it!
REG:
Well it stands to reason you'll
get more money, if you qualify.
GORDON:
That's wrong for a start.
Half the arts students in the States
are out of a job! And old Trelawny
gets about half your money-
REG: Who's Trelawny for God's sake ?
GORDON: My history teacher. And
he doesn't get time and a half for
fake overtime either!


JEAN: Mum.
REG:
Yes but he talks sense.
JEAN:
Ha ha.
REG:
Sometimes.
KATE'S LAUGHTER BREAKS OVER. THEY
GO ON EATING.
JEAN STIRS HER TEA.
REG BITES INTO TOAST, CRUNCH-CRNUCH.
CUT TO A COLLEGE LIBRARY, WITH KATE'S
LAUGHTER STILL OVER. IN ONE OF THE
CUBICLES KATE, AGED 20, and GORDON,
EGED 19, ARE SITTING CLOSE TOGETHER.
IT IS EVENING.
SHE HAS BOOKS BEFORE
HER. THE LIBRARY IS OTHERWISE
DESERTED. KATE IS FINISHING A
COLOURED CONTOUR MAP AND THERE ARE -
VARIOUS COLOURED INKS ON THE TABLE.
GORDON IS TRYING TO DAB A SPOT OF RED
INK FROM HIS NOSE WITH BLOTTING PAPER.
GORDON:
It won't come off.
KATE:
That was the idea.
HE DABS QUIETLY AND SHE RETURNS TO
HER HORK.
GORDON (LOOKING ROUND) I wish I
could work here. Ali these books.
I sit and dream about this college.
KATE: Dreamy!
Always dreaming!
And still at school! Eternal school-
boy!
GORDON SEIZES ONE OF THE INK POTS AS
IF TO POUR IT OVER HER.
SHE SHRIEK S
WITH LAUGHTER AND DASHES AWAY FROM
THE TABLE. HE CHASES ROUND THE
LIBRARY, AMONG THE SHADOWS.
WE HEAR
THEIR GASPED LAIGHTER. THEY STOP IN
ONE OF THE UNLIGHTED CUBICLES AND WE
DRAW INTO THEM.
KATE (IN A WHISPER)
You'll wake up
all the dead professors. We'vegot:
lots of dead professors!
GORDON PUTS HIS ARMS ROUND HER.
THEY KISS, OUI OF BREATH, STILL
GIGGLING.
KATE:
finish (HE IS
ITORE INTRREEUEBE Ito KISSING) They
gave me the key because they trusted
me (LAUGHING AGAIN)!


SHE TRIES TO STRUGGLE FREE.
GORDON:
Say something in Italian.
SHE LOOKS AT HIM FOR A MOMENT.
KATE: Sei un bischero tu!
(SCREAMING WITH LAUGHTER)
GORDON (TAICKLING HER)
What does
it mean?
KATE:
No! No!
Gordon---I
GORDON:
Yes?
KATE (TRYING NOT TO LAUGHBAGAIN)
It means you're very beautiful.
GORDON: It doesn't! (TICKLING
HER AGAIN)
Say something elsel
KATE: Sei tutto storto!
GORDON (IMITATING HER) To-to-to-
to-tol
KATE: Say it! 'Sono tutto storto
GORDON:
Sonnoh tuttoh tortoh eeoh!
KATE: Good! It means 'I'm complete-
ly twisted'T
MORE HELPLESS LAUGHTER AND TICKLING.
SHE IMITATES A TWISTED MAN, WITH
CROSS EYES.
SILENCE.
GORDON:
What does it feel like---
having two countries?
KATE:
Like being two people.
GORDON:
Is that nice?
KATE:
Yes. It means you have
two lives.
SILENCE.
GORDON:
It's funny---I've noticed--
you talk to your mother and father
as if they were our age.
KATE:
That's how they feel to me.
GORDON:
I can't even think of
my parents as human. I mean I love
them and all that.
KATE:
I've got to finish.


REG: Yes and I don't get nice
long holidays like he does!
GORDON:
He works harder in the
holidays than he does in term!
And he likes his work! He can't
stop doing it! He told me so him-
self. All that private coaching
he's giving me is for free. So
we're not all out for a good time
all the timel
SILENCE.
REG POURS HIMSELF ANOTHER
CUP OF TEA, EATING BUSILY.
REG (STIRRING)
What beats me is
how long you can go without doing
anything---I mean with your hands.
GORDON:
You're talking about
yourself.
REG: Oh I see. (TO JEAN) I'm
talking about myself. (TO GORDON)
How's that?
GORDON:
Well if you sat down
without a paper or a pint of beer
in front of you you'd have nothing
in your head. Whereas I've got
thoughts.
REG (HALF RISING) Oh you have have
you you snotty bugger----!
JEAN (TO REG) All right! He 's.
only taking the mike!
REG:
You take the mike much more
mate and I'll show you the back of
my handl
You idling pônce!
GORDON PUSHES BACK HIS CHAIR WITH A
CLATTER AND STAMPS OUT OF THE ROOM.
JEAN:
What did ycu say that for?
You know how: he hates that word
ponce.
You and him! I
don't even know what the word means!
It just comes out. He always had
to walk off like that---can't finish
anything---can't finish school---
can't start university-- --can't start
a job4--Chrsit knows what that girl
sees in him! She went to college
when she was eighteen---not him!
She's got her finals soon! And he
hasn't started!
(GIVING HER UNCONC-
ERNED FACL A GLANCE) Expect me to
be proud of that?


CUT TO A SMALL CLASSROOM AT
GORDON'S SCHOOL.
THERE ARE A FEW
DESKS SET ROUND THE ROOM CASUALLY,
AND COLIN TRELAWNY, A TEACHER IN
HIS EARLY THIRTIES, AND GORDON ARE
THE ONLY OCCUPANTS.
THERE IS NO
TEACHER'S ROSTRUM. THEY ARE SEATED
NEAR EACH OTHER AND TRELAWNY HAS
GORDON'S LATEST HANDWRITTEN PAPER
BEFORE HIM.
TRELAWNY: Do you really see what
I mean?
GORDON: I think so.
TRELAWNY GAZES AT HIM WITH SOME
HESITATION.
COLIN: There's another point.
You don't really believe that the
peasants rebelled in the fourteenth
century just because they couldn't
bear conditions any more.
Somebody
once said that revolutions came out
of hope, not despair. So perhaps
conditions in the fourteenth century
were better than they'd ever been
before.
GORDON:
Yes.
COLIN:
So why do you say the
opposite? I'll tell you why.
Because it saves you trouble.
GORDON IS GAZING AHEAD.
PAUSE.
COLIN:
Did you get any of that?
GORDON:
Yes.
COLIN:
It's not much use me giving
you private time if it's not going
to lead anywhere is it? I mean
you've got to pull your weight too.
GORDON:
COLIN: Yes, well, it's not good
getting emotional about it. You've
taken three university entrances and
you're not going to find a place any-
where unless you sit down and really
swear to get through. Because you'vve
got all it takes. You're first-class
university material---everybody knows
that.


GORDON:
It's no good swearing -
if I read any more I'd go blind.
I mean, I think I read too much---
I get mu dled up---as soon as I sit
down to write a paper it all fogs
over.
COLIN:
And what ideas have you
got for later on---after university?
Do you want to teach?
GORDON:
COLIN:
Research?
GORDON:
SILENCE.
GOBINI:
Civil service or something
like that?
GORDON: No.
COLIN:
What then?
GORDON:
I don't know.
CUT TO THE COLLEGE LIBRARY. STUDENTS
ARE POU. ING INTO IT AT LUNCHTIME.
THEY SRE SHUSHED QUIET BY THOSE STUDY-
ING. WE FIND KATE AT A CROWDED
TABLE IN ONE OF THE CUBICLES. SHE
IS TAKINGNOTES FROM A BOOK.
GORDON COMES IN, LOOKING ROUND.
HE SEES KATE AND GOES OVER AND SITS
OPPSOITE HER, GAZING AT HER WITH A
SMILE.
SHE IS STILL TAKING NOTES.
THEN SOMETHING MAKES HERBLOOK UP
AND SHE SEES HIM.
SHE MAKES A
DELIGHTED SMILE. SHE TEARS A PAGE
OUT OF HER NOTEBOKK AND WRITES SOME-
THING ON IT IN PENCIL. WITH A
GLANCE AT THE OTHER OCCUPANTS OF THE
TABLE SHE PUSHES THE PAPER ACROSS TO
GORDON.
HE READS IT.
WE SEE THE PAPER FROM HIS PV. IT
READS, IN BLOCK CAPITALS, 'I AM
PREGNANT'.
GUT TO THE PAGE LIVING ROOM. REG
IS WASHING AFTER WORK, AT THE SINK
IN THE KITCHENETTE. JEAN IS MAKING
TEA.
REG (STOOPED, AND BLINDED WITH WATER)
Got a towel there mate?
JEAN (PUSHING A TOWEL IN HIS OUT-
STRETCHED HAND) I wish to God
ycu'd use the bathroom.
REG:
Too nippy.


JEAN:
Yes well I said we should
have had a radiator put up there.
Everybody has radiators in their
bathrooms.
But nol
REG DRIES HIMSELF BRISKLY.
REG: I went in his bedroom just
now---books ell over the bed---on
the dresser---he must do some kind
of work.
JEAN: He just needs leaving alone
that's all.
REG: He needs a job! A boy of
nineteen still at school!
CUT TO ESMERALDA'S LANGUAGE CLASS.
ESMERALDA REIDOLFI IS KATE'S ITALIAN
MOTHER.
SHE IS IN HER LATE FORTIES,
DRESSED RATHER PICTUR ESQUELY. SHE
IS TEACHING FROM A ROSTRUM AND HAS
A BLACKBOARD BEHIND HER. THERE ARE
A DOZEN OR so PUPILS, ALL OF THEM
ADULT.
ESMERALDA: Io vorrei-- 'I would
like'. But Io voglio- 'I want8.
And io ti vottio bene---'I love you'l
(A LITTLE SQUEAL OF LAUGHTER ESCAPES
HER)
So what is 'I want'?
PUPILS: Ioh vohlioh!
ESMERALDA: 'I would like'?
PUPILS (NITH MORE DIFFICULTY) Ioh
vorray.
ESMERALDA: 'You would like'?
(THEIR EFFORTS FAIL) Io vorresti!
(ARCHLY) And 'I love you'?
PUPILS:
vorrei-
ESMERALDA: Io ti voglio bene!
Notice please, I cannot make Tyou'
formal---I cannot say io Le voglio
hons-wolf-ovidontly, because we
dont fall in love with staangers!
(ANOTHER SQUEAL)
Notice that we
Italians reserve adoro and ' amo'
'I love', 'I adore - --for things
rather than people. Io adoro
la tua casa-- --I simply adore your
house! Io adoro Mozart---io adoro
Parigi- -I love Parisl The reason?
In Italy we have the battle of the
sexes!


THE DOOR OPENS AND GORDON PEEPS
INSIDE.
ESMERALDA LOOKS ROUND.
SHE SHOWS SOME SURPRISE.
ESMERALDA:
Yes Gordon?
GORDON:
Could I see you a minute?
SHE GAZES AT HIM FOR A MOMENT AND
SEES THAT HE IS IN SOME DISTRESS.
ESME! ALDA (TO THE CLASS)
Will you
excuse me un momentino? Notice we
have one word for a tiny moment'.
The diminuitive is one of the most
decorative features of our language.
Now I am just going to have a word
with this ragazzino---this 'little
boy'---and I shall be back with you
in un momentino!
SHE LEAVES THE ROOM WITH GORDON.
CUT TO THE LOBBY OUTSIDE ESMERALDA 'S
CLASS AS SHE AND GORDON COME OUT.
THERE ARE HATS AND COATS HANGING
EVERYHHERE.
ESMERALDA (GRIPPING HIS ARM)
What
happened? Why isn't Kate with you?
GORDON:
She's got a lecture.
ESMERALDA (STILL GRIPPING HIS ARM)
What happened? (FACÈS CLOSE TOGETHER)
GORDON: She's going to have a baby.
(STARING AT HIM
FOR SOME TIME WITH HER MOUTH OPEN)
O Dio! No! Not Non èpossibilel
Nol (STRIKING AT HIM WILDLY)
MaIscalzone- -malscalzone che seil
Porcacone I Mia figlial Mia
ppvera figlia! 0 Diol Che
facio, che facio?
SOME OF THE PUPILE EMERGE FROM THE
CLASS AND TRY TO RESTRAIN HER.
SHE
TEARS HER OWN COAT FROM THE WALL.
ESMERALDA (TO GORDON) Dove sta
mia figlia? (GORDUN FAILS TO UNDER-
STAND) Dove sta?! Where is my
daughter?
GORDON:
At her college.
ESMERA:DA: Do you still drive your
father's car?
GORDON:
Yes.
ESMERALDA: Then take me there!


GORDON:
Where?
ESMERALDA: To my daughter!
(GRABBING HIM) Andiamo! E poi
ti sistemo subito eh? (PUSHING
HIM OUTSIDE) Scemol Sei un scemol
O Dio! Figlia mia! Che hai
fatto?
ESMERALDA AND GORDON DISAPPEAR.
THE PUPILS GAZE AT EACH OTHER.
PUPIL 1:
What's the trouble--
anybody speak Italian round here?
PUPIL 2:
She called him a lot of
dirty names, that's all I know.
Porcacione means a dirty pig.
PUPIL 3: I thought I heard him say
her daughter was having a baby.
PUPIL 1: What!
And he comes and
tells her himself. He wants his
brains testing!
PUPIL 2:
That's English integrity.
PUPIL 1:
English stupidity.
CUT TOE THE ENTRANCE HALL OF THE
PAGE HOUSE. A. TELEPHONE IS STAND-
ING IN THE CORNER ON A SHELF.
IT IS RINGING.
THE LIVING ROOM DOOR
OPENS AND REG EMERGES, EATING, IN
HIS OVERALLS. HE TAKES UP THE
RECEIVER AND MASTICATES STEADILY
BEFORE BEING ABLE TO SAY HULIO.
REG:
Hullo?
ESMERALDA (VO) Do I speak to his
father? I wish you to come to me
at once, can you get a bus, he has
your car, I have something to speak,
my husband is not in!
REG (GETTING RID OF THE LAST OF HIS
FOOD PREMATURELY) Here, hold on,
hold on! Have you got the right
number?
ESMERALDA (VO) He is with me--
you must come---he is here!
REG:
Whothe hell's he?
ESMERALDA (VO) What is your name?---
Gordon!
Gordon!
REG:
What, my son?
What's up
then? Is he all right?
who are
you?


ESMERALDA (vo, SCREAMING WITH
IMPATIENCE) Her mother! Her
mother!
REG: What do you mean, 'her'?
You're talking about my son aren' 't
you?
JEAN EMERGES FROM THE LIVING ROOM,
ALSO EATING.
JEAN:
Who is it?
REG:
That's what I'd like to knowl
ESMERALDA (VO) O Dio, che imbroglio!
(SPEAKING TO KATE AT THE OTHER END)
Caterina, Vieni tu! Suo babbo
capisce fischi per fiaschil
KATE (VO) Hullo, Mr Page? . My
mother would like you to come over
and see us.
REG:
What's that? Your mother?
And who are you?
KATE (VO) I'm Kate.
REG: Oh, hullo Katel
JEAN: Is Gordon all right---where
is he?
REG (TO JEAN) Be quiet, for Christ
sakel I can t listen to two lunatics
at once! Hullo?
Kate? lihat's up
then?
KATE (VO) Nothing. Only mum
would like you to come over and see
her---right away.
REG: Well something must be up then
mustn't it? Where's Gordon?
KATE (VO) He's here.
REG: 'He's here' she says! (WITH
QUIET IRRITATION) Hand him over will
you please dear?
GORDON (VO) Hullo dad.
REG: 'Hullo dad'. what's the
trouble now? You in a Spanish
prison or something?
GORDON (VO) It's Italian, not
Spanish.


REG:
All right, when you've
finished giving me lip, what's
wrong?
GORDON (VO) Kate's mother wants
to see you right away!
REG: So there's trouble isn't
there? Listen, are you too bloody
educated to form a simple phrase?.
GORDON:
Well, she wants to see
you that's all.
REG (SLOWLY)
trouble?
GORDON (VO) Kate's having a baby..
REG: Oh blimey!
CUT TO THE LOCAL REGISTRY OFFICE.
WE ARL FACING THE REGISTRAR WHO IS
READING THE CIVIL WEDDING CEREMONY
TO KATE AND GORDON.
REGISTRAR:.. Will you join hands
please? Say after me, I Gordon
Page, will take Katarina Maria
GORDON:
I Gordon Page...;
REGISTRAR (TO KATE)
Will you
please say after me, I KATARINA
Maria Ridalfi--
A WOMAN'S SOBS ARE HEARD.
THE
REGISTRAR LOOKS UP AND MAKES AN
EMBARRASSED SMILE, THEN GOES ON.
REGISTRAR:---will take Gordon
Page.
KATE: I Catarina Maria Ridolfi
will take Gordon Page....
ESMERA:DA'S SOBS CONTINUE. WE PULL
BACK TO FIND REG AND JEAN TOGETHER
AND, SOME SEATS AWAY, GIORGIO AND
ESMERALDA RIDOLFI. GIORGIO IS A
MILD ROMAN IN HIS EARLY MIDDLE AGE
AND HE IS GIVING RHE SOBBING ESMERALDA
DRYLY IMPATIENT LOOKS. ALSO PRESENT
AS VITNESS IS COLIN TRELAWNY.
REGISTRAR: Will you please put the
ring on the lady's marriage finger?
GORDON DOES so.
THE SOBS CONTINUE.


REGISTRAR:
Well, now you are
married, and it remains for me to wish
you a long and happy life together.
You are both young--
ESMERALDA: Pur troppo!
GIORGIO GIVES HER A LONG DRY LOOK.
REGISTRAR:
--very young, at the
beginning of your life and --I am
sure---careers too!
ESMERALDA (CYNICALLY) Ha!
REGISTRAR: Nowadays perhaps we
tend to overlook the basic meaning
of marriage, which is to have children.
ESMERALDA: O!
GIORGIO:
Ma Esmeralda!
REGISTRAR:
There is nothing else
in marriage that can replacé a child,
and I hope---I hope with all my
heart---that you will soon be a
mother and father.
EEMERALDA: Sono gial
GIRGIO: Ma Esmeralda, vuon ché ti
porto fuori?
ESMERALDA: Si! Portami in inferno!
GIORGIO (TO HIMSELF) GRITTING HIS
TEETH) Mannaggia, misericordial
REGISTRAR:
Now we just have to
sign the book-
TRELAUNYAS THE WITNESS MOVES FORWARD
WITH GORDON AND KATE. EVERYONE
FORMS A GROUP ROUND THE MARRIED
COUPLE, THOUGH THERE IS NO REJOICING
CUT TO GINO'S RESTAURANT IN SOHO.
IT IS CROWDED MOSTLY WITH ITALIANS.
A LONG TABLE IN THE CORNER HAS THE
WEDDING PARTY ROUND IT---GORDON,
KATE, TRELAENY, GIORGIO, ESMERALDA,
JEAN AND REG. THOy ARÉ ON THEIR
FIRST COURSE-- -MELON AND SMOKED HAM.
THERE ARE CARADES OF RED WINE AND
SEVERAL PLATES IN THE MIDDLE OF THE
TABLE CONTAINING BREAD AND CROSTINI
IN CELLOPHANE PACKETS. LOUD ITALIAN
TALK COMES OVER.
GIORGIO IS AT THE HEAD OF THE TABLE
AT ONE END, AND REG AT THE OTHER.


GORDON AND KATE ARE SEATED
TOGETHER, WITH KATE NEXT TO REG,
AND OPPOSITE THEM ARE ESMERALDA
(ALSO NEXT TO REG), COLIN TRELAWNY
AND JEAN PAGE (NEXT TO GIORGIO).
GINO HIMSELF IS LOOKING AFTER THE
TABLE, WITH TWO YOUNG WIATERS
GOING TO AND FRO. HE BENDS IN
CONFERENCE WITH GIORGIO RIDOLFI.
ESMERALDA (ACROSS TO KATE) Come
senti?
KATE (WITH TENDER IMPATIENCE)
Bene, mamma, benel (TO GORDON)
She always wants to know how I feel!
ESMERALDA (STILL TO KATE) Il
prosciutto non ti ha fatto male eh?
KATE: No! Per carital (TO GORDON)
She says did the ham make me feel
bad.
ESMERALDA: If I wish to talk to
Gordon I'm capable of doing so on
my own behalfi I not only speak
English but I teach it!
KATE: You teach Italian!
ESMERALDA (GIVING IT TO THE WHOLE
TABLE) To some of them I teach
English too---to those who are
happier with a screwdriver in their
hands, and a length of electric wire,
than a book!
GORDON FINDS THIS THRUST AMUSING
AND GLANCES AT REG.
JEAN: Oh we've got to have people
working with their hands Mrs Ridoli
(PRONOUNCED RIDDLE-Y).
ESMERALDA IS MAGNIFICENTLY UNAWARE
OF JEAN.
REG (TO GORDON)
What's so funny?
GORDON: No, I was just thinking I'd
prefer a civilisation with candles.
REG: You try and get your cenbral
heating going with candles---I mean,
you're not an enemy of central heat-
ing are Jou? Considering you put
the thermostat up to 80-odd every
time you come in the house!
JEAN (QUIETLY) All right, all
right.
GIORGIO:
Now what may I order?


ESMERALDA: Io prendo un carciofo,
non condito!
KATE LAUGHS. GINO THE RESTAURATEUR
SMILES DOUBTFULLY.
ESMERALDA: Ma sil Ora che c'ho
un carciofo in famiglia---allora lo
mangio!
KATE LAUGHS LOUDER.
GIORGIO (SCOLDING ESMERALDA)
Esmeralda---un po' di educazione,
ESMERALDA (WITH A TOSS OF HER HEAD)
Educazione - 'educazione'l
KATE (TO GORDON) She says all she
wants to eat is an artichoke without
any dressing---she says she's got
one in the family now, so she might
as well eat one!
GORDON:
Got what?
KATE: An artichoke!
It means a
fool!
GORDON (HIS SMILE SOURED) Oh thanks
very much!
GIORGIO (TO JEAN) Now what would
you like Mrs Page?
JEAN (WITH A HELPLESS GLANCE AT
REG) Well, I'm not used to your
food---I can find my way in Spanish---
REG: Let him order for you. You
order what you think we'd like, Mr
Ridolifi. We'll try anything--
once! (WITH AN ATTEMPED LAUGH)
GORDON:
Oh dear!
JEAN (SOTTO VOCE, TO GORDON) Stop
taking the mike!
GIBRGIO: Well I know what's good
here at Gino's---I recommend the
saltimbocca alla romana.
REG (ENCOURAGINGLY) Oh yes.
GIORGIO GIVES THE ORDER TO GINO.
ESMERALDA: Literally it means
'leap into the mouth'---in the Roman
way!
REG: Oh!
GINO LEAVES WITH THE ORDER.


JEAN:
It isn't alive is it
because (THE WINE GIVES HER A
SUDDEN CONFIDETIAL TONE) they told
me once ousters was alive, and I
never touched them again---you know,
Icouldn'tl---I went cold all over-
and I had it in my mouthi
ESMERALDA LEANS AWAY FROM HER.
REG MAKES SYMPATHETIC LAUGHTER FOR
JEAN.
ESMERALDA (LEVELLY, TOJEAN) Not,
only is saltimbocca very much alive,
like all things Italian---it is
impaled on a stick---in the cruellest
way.
CUT TO A LARGE PLATTER BEARING
A NUMBER OF SALTIMBOCCHE (STEAK WITH
A SLICE OF BACON SECURED TO IT BY
MEANS OF A TOOTHPICK) AS IT IS
CARRIED SHOULDER-HIGH ACROSS THE
ROOM. FOLLOW IT TO OUR PARTY,
WHICH IS IN TALK EXCEPT FOR
ESMERALDA.
THE DISH IS SERVED.
WAITERS ALSO
SERVE FRENCH FRIED AND SPINACH,
ON SIDE PLATES. REG AND JEAN WATCH
THE. SALTIMBOCCA WITH SOME DOUBT.
REG (TO ESMERALDA)
Well, I can
recognise the top layer---it's a
nice homely
of bacon, unless
my eyes have
deceiving me
68b6r
again.
REG TOUCHES THE TOOTHPICK.
GORDON (TO REG) You've got. to eat
that.
REG: Eh?
GORDON: That's not a toothpick
like it looks. It's a delicacy.
From Naples.
REG: You're a scream today.
Good thing you don't get married
often.
COLIN TRELAWNY AND GIORGIO REMOVE
THE TOOTHPICKS EROM THEIR MEAT.
WITH A LOOK AT GORDON REG DOES THE
SAME. GIORGIO RAISES HIS GLASS
TOWARDS THE NEWLY MARRIED COUPLE.
GIORGIO: Le spose! (TO JEAN) It
means the bride and bridegroom.
JEAN: Oh yes!


REG, JEAN AND TRELAWNY RIASE THEIR
GLASSES TOWARDS THE COUPLE.
ESMERALDA REMAINS QUITE STILL.
GIORGIO (SHOCKED, TO ESMERALDA)
Ma Esmeralda, veramente---I
SHE RAISES HER GLASS SLOWLY TONARDS
KATE.
ESMERALDA: A mia figlial (DRINKING
THE GLASS EMPTY, THEN WITH A SMACK
OF THE LIPS:)
Perchè hai fatto
la sciocca?
THE WAITERS LOOK AT HER WITH ASTON-
ISHMENT, UNCERTAIN WHETHER TO
LAUGH. GIORGIO SHRUGS AND DECIDES
TO TREAT IT AS A JOKE. BUT KATE
IS STUNG BY HER MOTHER'S QUESTION
AND GLARES AT HER.
GIORGIO:
Here's health!
THEY ALL DRINK EXCEPT ESMERALDA.
KATE (TO ESMERALDA, WITH ANGER)
Perchë vuoi fare una scena? Sono
sposata no? Allora? Ho scelto
mio marito!
ESMEALDA (BURSTING INTO TEARS) Si,
si, hai sceltol Ma hai scelto
malel 0 Diol Che disastrol
Avevo un sogno---di un marito---
per tel 0 Diol
GORDON (TO KATE)
What's she on
about?
KATE (WITH GLARES AT HER MOTHER)
She keeps on saying I've been
stupid---and madc a bad choice---
and she always dreamed of a better
GIORGIO: Katarina!
GORDON: Oh that's nicel
JEAN: It's no good crying over
spilt milk Mrs Ridoli, I mean I
could have cried too (SHE NEARLY
DOES, PUCKERING UP HER LIPS) I
lost a boy of nineteen---an only
son---your girl's twenty-one--I
REG:
Don't you start!
JEAN: And I don't know whether he
did it!
There's no proof he did it!
gonaon;
Did what?


JEAN (TO GORDON) She could have
had others! (FULL FLOOD NOW)
There was no blood tests---nothing
of that! Only what you said (TO
ESMERALDA)! I reckon we was
pushed into itl
GIORGIO GAZES AT THE TWO WEEPING
WOMEN WI:H COOL SCEPTICISM, AND
GIVES AN UPWARD GLANCE OF RESIGN-
NATION TO ONE OF THE WAITERS.
GINO BUSTLES ROUND HIM.
GINO (WITH JOY) All mothers cry
on wedding days. Che bellezza!
GIOGIO (TO GINO)
Fill the glasses
GINO DOES so.
GINO (TO ESMERALDA, WITH ENCOURAGE-
MENT) Forza, signora!
(TO JEAN)
Courage, madam! (Bending down)
Think of a beautiful grandson! -
ESMERALDA:
0 Diol
KATE: Well if it's going to be
this kind of party I'm clearing
offT (TO GORDON) Come on!
Let's go and see a film!
GORDON AND KATE GET UP BUT BEFORE
THEY GO KATE LEANS OVER TOVARDS
JEAN.
KATE:
And she didn't have others.
She had this one because she loves
him!
GIORGIO (ALSO RISING) Katerina,
vieni duoil Ma Vieni! cocca mia!
HE GOES TO HIS DAUGHTER LOVINGLY.
SHE KISSES HIM, WITH A SPECIAL SMILE.
ESMERALFA (TO KATE) Si, vai vial
Lascia la tua mamma! Sil
KATE (TO ESMERALDA)
Well promise
to behave then!
ESMERALDA (DRYING HER EYES) Si, si,
I promise to behave!
KATE DRAWS GORDON BACK TO THE TABLE,
AND GIORGIO MAKES A SATISFIED 'Oh-h-h!'
AS HE SITS DOWN AGAIN.
ESMERALDA (STILL DRYING AND HEAVING,
TO GORDON) Vieni qui, figlio mio!
KATE (TO GORDON) She says go over
there.
You're her son now.
ESMERALDA. (EMBRACING GORDON) Da
ml un baciettol


KATE (TRANSLATING DRILY)
Give her
a kiss.
ESMERALDA (KISSING HIM, THEN STROKING
HIS FACE) Seinbellol Sei anche
bello!
KATE:
You're beautiful.
GORDON: YesI got that bit.
ESMERALDA: Mia figlia ha scelta
bene!
KATE (FIXING HER MOTHEI WITH HER
EYES) 'My daughter chose well'.
GIORGIO:
KATE (WITH A SIGH) Now perhaps
we can eat. (TO GORDON) Come on!
GO DOI RETU. i.S TO HIS PLACE.
GIORGIO (RAISING HIS GLASS AGAIN)
Le sposel
TRELALNY (HE HAS BEEN SINKING WINE
QUIETLY) Ley spoeey!
THEY ALL DRINK. ESMERALDA DRINKS
WITH SOMETHING LIKE DESPARATION,
AND ALL BUT CHOKES. SHE PUTS THE
EMPTY GLASS DOWN LIKE A HATCHET SHE
IS BURYING WITH GREAT UNWILLINGNESS.
SHE THEN BEGINS EATING, AFTER WITH-
DRAWING THE TOOTHPICK WITH A GESTURE
OF CONEEMPY AND THROWING IT OVER HER
SHOULDER.
JEAN TACKLES HER FOOD
WITH REMINISCENT SNIFFS.
CUT TO THE SAME RESTAURANT LATER.
THERE ARE NO OTHER CLIENTS APART
FROM THE WEDDING PARTY. THE DOOR
TO THE STREET HAS BEEN CLOSED.
THE PARTY IS NOW DIVIDED INTO GROUPS,
SITIING AT VARIOUS TABLES. A
WAITER IS SEATED NEAR THE KITCHEN
ENTRANCEA SHOKING.
THEY HAVE ALL
BEEN DRINKING COFFEE.
GIORGIO AND
REG ARE SMOKING FAT CIGARS.
COLIN
TRELAUNY IS TALKING TO ESMERALDA
AT ANOTHER TABLE.
JEAN, GORDON AND
KATE MAKE UP ANOTHER GROUP.
ESMERALDAIS MAKING UP HER FACE WITH
IMPATIENT DETACHMENT AS COLIN'
TRELAWNY TALKS TO HER.
COLIN (HIS STOMACH STILL BOILING
HITH CHIANTI) I thought thet was
marvellous---àll alone in the Forum--
yes, Rome in August!
ESMERALDA:
thich is like saying
you put your head in a hot oven for
Baaegure! Rome in August is un-


COLIN:
Well we had air condition-
ing of course.
And you could always
get a breeze up at the top of-
ESMERALDA (CUTTING HIM OFF) Tell
me---I want the truth---will he
(NODDING TOWARDS GORDON) pass his
exams?
COLIN (CHIANTI TAKEN BY SURPRISE)
WE CUT TO JEANO, KATE AND GORDON.
JEAN (SECRETIVELY FISHING IN HER BAG)
Here--- (BRINGING OUT AN ENVELOP AND
GIVING IT TO GORDON)---take this--
don't let your dad see.
GORDON:
What is it?
JEAN:
You know what it ist I can
tell by your eyes!
It's what mum
gave me to buy a colour TV set--
you have a good honeymoon son--
you'11 get two weeks of fun out of
that-
GORDON:
But dad's already given
me some e
JEAN:
You won't get far on twenty
pounds mate!
KATE (TO JEAN) But you shouldn't
Mrs Page---my father's paid the
hotel in advance--
JEAN: Well, you keep this for pure
fun then. You've got to be clever
in this world. I used to play my
father some tricks. (TO KATE) He's
gone tow. He had more money tucked
away than he ever said. All in the
post office. Anyway (TO GORDON)
you shouldn't touch her money (MEAN-
ING KATE'S)---start independent--
(WITH A WINK AT KATE) Eh, Kate?
GORDON (FEELING THE ENVLOP IN HIS
POCKET) It seems such a lot.
JEAN: It's the price of a colour TV.
(TO KATE) Your mother's very emotio n
al isn't she? Still I suppose it's
the Italianblood.
KATE: No. It's just her. Daddy's
not like that. She's always been
the same. Her friends in Milan call
her Theodora Dusa.


CUT TO REG AND GIORGIO.
REG IS
HAVING TROU: LE WITH HIS CIGAR.
REG:
Yes I've often said to the
wife let's go down to Italy this year
but it always seems to be Spain.
(PUFF AND EXPLOSIVE COUGH)
GORDON IS WATCHING HIM FROM THE
OTHER SIDE OF THE ROOM AND IS
AMUSED.
REG REGISTERS THIS WITH
A SCOWL.
GIORGIO GAZES AT REG IN
A PLACIDLY BLWILDERED WAY. HE
TOUCHES REG'S ARM CONFIDENTIALLY
AND DRAWS NEARER TO HIM.
GIORGIO: MrvPage, my wife and I
were thinking---how will Katerina
and Gordon live? I believe Gordon
has his exams soon?
REG:
That's right (PFAHHI) He
GIORGIO: What kind of career you
visulaise for the boy, Mr Page?
REG: Well I mean that's really up
to the boy isn't it? I mean you can
dictate up to a certain point, can't
you, but you've got to leave them
a free hand haven't you?
GIORGIO: You see, we have to think
of Katerina, only twenty-one, and
there's the child, I'm afraid I
don't know Gordon very well. It
was all done rather quickly.
REG: You're telling me.
GIROGIO: Has he a good brain?
REG: Brain? That boy? You ought
to hear him talk. It's marvellous.
Some of the things he comes out with.
1141 this and 1705 that. He's got
it all pat. You can't pull him
on anything! You're stumped from tho
word go where young Gordon 's con-
cerned (GIORGIO IS QUITE LOST NOW),
you're on the floor! (GIORGIO BLANCES
AT THE FLOOR) Of course I choke him
off sometimes, when he gives me a bit
too much lip---that's his trouble,
Mg Ridolifi, he's got too much lip--
GIORGIO (STRAINING) Lip?
REG (HITH A LAUGH) I tell you, I
could give him a lovely smack round


the chops sometimes! Oo (RUBBING
THE PALM OF HIS HAND) it itches!
Know what I mean?
GIORGIO (STARING DOWN AT REG'S HAND
WITH SOMETHING LIKE FEAR) Oh yes.
REG: But I always. hold back because
I think that when you've got some-
thing upstairs, you've got a right
to take the mickey, unlike most peopbe,
who tend to be solid from the neck
up! I must say I think your wife's
got all it takes--as far as noose
goes---there are no flies on her!
GIORGIO (SCREWING UP HIS EYES
IN DISTRESS) Flies? on my wife?
CUT TO A HOTEL BEDROOM AT A SEASIDE
RESORT.
GORDON IS IN BED READING
A.L.SMITH'S 'CHURCH AND STATE IN THE
MIDDLE AGES'. KATE, IN A NIGHT-
DRESS, IS JUST COMING FROM THE BATH-
ROOM, BRUSHING HER HAIR.
GORDON (LOOKING UP)
Can you hear
the sea?
KATE: I wish it was Italy.
GORDON:
KATE (GAZING AT HIM) You read much
more than I do don't you? Yet I
sail through every time.
GORDON:
You're just a mimic.
You pour it in and then you pour it
out. But I've got a brain.
SHE LAUGHS.
KATE (SITTING ON THE BEDJ No but
honestly what's the trouble?
GORDON: I don't know! I reckon
that if I lived in a place like this
I could work alright. (FLICKING
THROUGH THE PAGES) I've already
read twenty pages. It's when I
start thinking about it as work--
I try and work at it too much---
whereas with you it seems easy--
KATE:
When I work?
GORDON: Yes. I mean you look as
if you're enjoying it. And I make
it a grind.That's how he talks-
dad. Unless it's a gring it's not
work. So if you've got a happy
face you're having it cushy. I think
it gets inside you don't you--what
your parents think?
(KATE SHRUGS)
Do you think we love each other?


KATE: I don't know. - I don't
care. I mean, we've never had
anybody else have we?
SILENCE.
GORDON (TOUCHING HER STOMACH) Are
you sure you've got something
there? It's invisible.
KATE: You're looking in the FkaE
wrong place. It's here (INDICATING
HER EYES)--can't you see I'm
having a baby?
GORDON (WITH A LAUGH)
YES!
SILENCE.
KATE: Do you think you'll get
through this time?
HE GAZES AT HER.
GORDON:
Not if I go back
home.
KATE: Gordon---why don't you
come and live with us?
GORDON SHAKES HIS HEAD MUTELY.
CUT TO THE PAGE LIVING ROOM.
IT IS EVENING.
JEAN IS GETTING
TEA AND REG IS DRYING HIS FACE
AFTER A WASH.
JEAN (FROM THE KITCHENETTE) I
wish you'd use the bathroom
upstairs!
REG: Yes, you've said that
before! If it'll keep you quiet
I'al have another radiator put
upstairs this week. We can use
some of that money your mother
gave you for a colour TV.
SILENCE.
JEAN IS BUSY WITH THE
TEA.
REG (EMERGING FROM THE TOWEL AGAIN)
Did you put it in the post office?
JEAN:
Yes.
REG: Well that's funny, I was
in there Saturday morning and-
JEAN (SCREAMING) Now for Christ
sake get those overalls off and
sitdown to your tea!
REG (LEAVING) I'm never late
for plaice and chipsi


HE TRIPS OUT OF THE ROOM PLAY-
FULLY. BUT THEN PUTS HIS HEAD BACKMIN.
REG (IN A LOW VOICE) Is he in then?
JEAN (ALSO LOW) What?
REG: His light's on.
Did he
come back in?
JEAN: He must have done then.
REG: It's not right, I don't care
what you say---a kid of that age
married, only just out of school!
JEAN: We should have put our foot
down.
We were pushed into that
nicely. I'd give her Esmeralda
if I was her old man!
REG: You'd better put another
couple of fillets on.
JEAN: All right---you look after
your business and I'll look after
mine---now get a decent shirt on!
HE LEAVES.
She wanders back into
the kitchenette.
JEAN: 'Couple of fillets'.
CUT TO GORDON'S BEDROOM. HE IS
TRYING TO TAKE NOTES FROM A BOOK.
HE CANNOT CONCENTRATE.
HE STARTS
CRYING TO HIMSELF.
JEAN (VO) Gordon?
GORDON: Yes?
JEAN (VO) I've got a nice piece of
fried plaice down here for you!
GORDON: OK I'll be down.
JEAN (VO) Are you all right?
SHE HAS HEARD SOMETHING IN HIS
VOICE AND IS COMING UPSTAIRS.
HE TRIES TO HIDE HIS STATE BEFORE
SHE COMES IN. JEAN PEEPS ROUND
THE DOOR.
JEAN: Here, you've been crying.
Has that woman been playing you up
again?
REG (BEHIND HER) What's wrong with
him?
REG APPEARS TOO.
GORDON (IN TEARS) Ican't concentrate!
It's no good!


JEAN GOES TO THE BED AND DRAWS HIS
HEAD TOWARDS HER.
JEAN:
There, don'tbyou mind about
thatl
Exams aren't everything.
If you worried a bit less you might
be all right.
REG: Esmeralda hasn't been at it
again has she?
GORDON: No.
REG:
You tell her where to stuff
it when she starts leading off again.
Tell her, just leave me alone Mrs
Ridolifi, because it's me taking the
exams not you.
GORDON: I wish you'd say her name
right.
It's Mrs Ridolfi.
JEAN:
Anyway I've cooked a lovely
bit of fish, duck. Come on. Then
we'll go down and have a drink. And
try and forget our worries eh?
CUT TO REG, GORDON AND JEAN AT THE
PUB DOWN THE ROAD.
JEAN AND GORDON
ARE JUST ABOUT TO SIT DOWN, AND REG
IS ABOUT TO GO TO THE BAR TO ORDER.
JEAN: I think I'll have a gin and
tonic.
REG:
What's yours, son?
GORDON:
Glass of red wine: please.
JEAN:
Getting quite Italian eh?
REG GOES TO THE BAR.
JLAN:
Where's Kate these days?
GORDON:
She's got her finals next
week.
JEAN: I wonder you go round there
at all. You seem to have lost
your spirit son---you used to give
your dad a bit of lip but now-
GORDON: I told you, she's got her
exams.
JEAN (AS REG COMES WITH THE DRINKS)
You should never have got married---
a couple of kids like you! Honestly,
I don't know how that Esmeralda did
it---she just wound us round her little
finger! And this bloke (MEANING
REG) was the first to say ye S.


REG (LAYING DOWN THE DRINKS)
What's that?
JEAN: Nothing,
(TO GORDON)
You ought to get yourself digs at
least.
Just you and her. It's
wrong not living together.
GORDON:
Where do I. get the money?
JEAN: Oh we might be able to cough
up something. I can go back to the
REG:
You're not going back to that
GORDON DOWNS HIS GLASS IN ONE GO.
JEAN (TO REG) Are you going to let
her look down her nose at him for the
rest of his life then? 'Anyway I
enjoyed that job at the Co-op.
REG (TO GORDON) - Blimey, that was
quick wasn't it?
JEAN: Oh go on! Let him enjoy
himself!
CUT TO GORDON'S BEDROOM. HE PUSHES
OPEN THE DOOR UNSTEADILY, HAVING HAD
SEVERAL GLASSES OF WINE. HE LOOKS
ROUND AT HIS BOOKS. HE MARCHES TO
THE BED AND CLOSES THEM ALL. HE
PACKS THEM RESOLUTELY INTO PILES
AND STACKS THEM ON THE CHEST OF
DRAWERS. HB THROWS AWAY HIS BOOK
OF NOTES. HE LEAVES THE ROOM.
CUT TO GIORGIO RIDOLFI'S OFFICE.
HE IS CLEARLY IN THE TOURIST BUSINESS.
THERE ARE POSTERS ROUND THE WALL
ADVERTISING ITALY. HE IS WORKING
AT HIS DESK IN HIS SHIRTSLEEVES.
THE INTERCOM BUZZES.
GIORGIO (PRESSING THE CONTACT) Si?
SECRETARY (VO) C8eun signore, a un
giovanotto---dice che Le conosce-
GIORGIO (STILL ATTENDING TO HIS
WORK). Come si chiama?
SECRETARY (VO) Gordon Page.
GIORGIO: Ah---è il mio genero--
si, mandarlo a me!
SEVRETARY (VO) Va bene.
GIORGIO GOES ON WORKING.
THE DOOR
OPENS AND THE SECRETARY USHERS IN
GORDON.
GIORGIO GETS UP AND GOES
ROUND HIS DESK TO SHAKE HANDS AFFECT-
IONATELY.


GIORGIO (SHOWING HIM TO A CHAIR)
Here.
Such a sad face.
GORDON (WITH A SHRUG) Oh!
GIORGIO (PULLING UP ANOTHER CHAIR
CLOSE TO HIM) You lunch with me?
GORDON:
Oh thanks.
GIORGIO:
Any trouble?
GORDON: I'm not trying for the
university any more. I thought
I'd get a job. I wondered if you
could help me.
GIRGIO GAZES AT HIM FOR SOME TIME.
GIORGIO: Why you give up?
GORDON: I know it's no good.
GIORGIO: Are you sure?
GORDON: Yes.
GIORGIO GOES TO THE DESK AND TAKES
UP A PHONE. STILL GAZING AT GORDON
HE DIALS A NUMBER. ESMERALDA
ANSWERS AT THE OTHER END.
ESMERALDA (VO) Pronto?
GIORGIO: E Giorgio. Viené qui
subito. Tratta di Gordon.
ESMERALDA (VO) Ch'è successo?
GIORGIO: Niente. Vieni quil
ESMERALDA (VO) Vengo subitol
GIORGIO (AS HE PUTS THE PHONE
DOWN AGAIN) My wife's coming right
now.
CUT TO ESMERALDA PUFFINGLY CLIMB-
ING CEMENT STAIRS.
SHE REACHES
THE LITTLE CIOAKROOM OUTSIDE HER
CLASS.
THERE ARE A NUMBER OF HER
PUPILS STANDING AROUND.
ESMERALDA (TO ANY OF THEM) Have you
seen Mr Wainwright?
PUPIL 1: He's here (INDICATING THE
CLASSROOM).
SHE PASSES THROUGH TO THE CLASSROOM.
HERE ARTHUR WAINWRIGHT, A SHAGGY
MIDDLE-AGED INKA CHER, IS DRINKING A
CUP OF TEA. a
WAINWRIGHT: Hullo Mrs Ridolfi.
ESMERALDA: My,
must
learn Italian right eonrlanlgy


WAINWRIGHT STARES AT HER FOR A
MOMENT IN SURPRISE.
WAINWRIGHT: You mean to say that
pretty daughter of yours got married?
I thought you had her all lined up
for me!
ESMERALDA (SOARING PAST HIS FACET-
IOUSNESS) Could he come to my
Italian class?
WAINWRIGHT: Well of course he could,
Mrs Ridolfi, that's for you to day.
ESMERALDA: But it's not up to me
to pay---that's what I want to avoid!
WAINWRIGHT (WITH A SMILE) Ahl
ESMERALDA: Couldn't he take some
of the English classes for foreign
students, the elementary ones, and
make it up that way?
WAINWRIGHT: Well you are quick on
the drawer! Ne're butter in your
fingers, aren't we, Mrs Ridolfi, eh?
Has he got his A levels?
ESMERALDA: Oh yes, one or two, and
a few O levels too. All the levels
except a. level head!
CUT TO A CORRIDOR IN KATE'S COLLEGE.
SHE IS JUST LEAVING THE LIBRARY,
CARRYING A BRIEFCASE FAT WITH BOOKS.
SHE IS BEGINNING TO SHOW SIGNS OF
PREGNANCY.
SHE HURRIES ALONG.
SOMEORE CALLS HER FROM BEHIND. IT
IS COLIN TRELAW/NY. SHE TURNS.
COLIN (APPROACHING)
Mrs Page!
KATE: Hullo. I'm not used to being
called that.
TRELAUNY:
I've been looking for
you everywhere. I got an hour off
from school.
KATE (DARKENING) It's about Gordon.
TRELAWNY: You know he wants to give
up and find a job don't you?
KATE: What?
TRELAWNY: He didn't tell you?
KATE: No!
TRELAWNY: Your father's found him
a job.


KATE (OUTRAGED) My father!
TRELAWNY: You know, it's broken
my heart. It seems mad---just a
couple of A levels and-- You know
he nearly got a history place at
Cambridge last year don't you?
They wrote me a special letter about
him.
BURST IN WITH THE SOUNDS OF A
FOOTBALL MATCH AND CUT TO THE PAGE
LIVING ROOM WHERE REG IS WATCHING
AN INTERNATIONAL GAME ON TV. JEAN'
IS AT HIS SIDE EATING CHOCOLATES.
THE TV FLICKERS IN THEIR FACES.
REG: Go on! Go on! Oh Blimey!
Honest, he thinks you play, with your
hands, that feller. What's his
name?
JEAN SHRUGS AND GOES ON EATING.
REG: He always doe S that---he---
A RING AT THE FRON.-DOOR BELL.
JEAN: That must be Gordon. If he
forgets his key again I'll tie it
round his bloody neck. (GETTING UP
SIOWLY)
REG: Oh! (DANCING IN HIS SEAT)
YOU cockeyed ponce---I
THE BELL RINGS AGAIN.
JEAN (AS SHE REACHES THE DOOR,
TURNING BACK) And don't use that
word!
REG (GLUED TO THE SEAT) Cord love
old Ireland---fidgetarsing about
between goalposts!
JEAN (VO) Oh Hullo Kate. Good
evening Mr Trelawny, this is a
nice surprise.
REG COCKS AN EAR. HE HUMPS UP,
TIGHTENS HIS TROUSERS WHICH WERE
LOOSE, DIVES TO THE TV SET AND
SWITCHES IT OFF.
JEAN (VO) Reggy?
REG (STANDING AT THE READY) Yes
dear?
JEAN (VO) It's kate and Mr
Trelawny.
REG: Oh that's nicel
KATE AND COLIN TRELAWNY COME IN,


FOLLOWED BY JEAN.
JEAN: Well how are you keeping
Kate?
KATE: I'm fine, thank you.
JEAN (WITH A GLANCE AT KATE'S
TUMMY) That's right.
REG: Make you self comfortable
Mr Trelawny (AS THEY ALL SIT DOWN).
TRELAWNY: Well I'll cut a long story
short by saying we've come about
Gordon.
JEAN: What's up with Gordon?
TRELAWNY: He won't be going to
the university after all.
REG: Since when?
TRELAWNY: So you don't know either?
REG: Not us.
TRELAWNY: Well he came to me
yesterdaybwith all his books. He
said Kate's father had offered him
a job. I asked Kate about it
and she said she didn't know. He
didn't have a word with you before-
hand?
JEAN:What sort of a job would that -
be then?
KATE: My father works in a tourist
company and he wants Gordon to be
one of his couriers---
JEAN: Oh! That sounds nice!
REG: What would the work consist
of exactly, looking after charabanc
loads I expect, seeing to the fun
and games side, we had acourier in
Spain, do you remember Jean, he was
a scream! He put that thing in
our bed--
JEAN: Oh yes!
REG (TO TRELAWNY) You know, they're
little bits of plastic got up to
look like dog's bushness. Talk
about laugh!
JEAN: I didn't laugh, not when I
saw it. And I can't see Gordon


playing that sort of joke.
TRELAWNY: I just thought it was a
terrible tragedy him giving up the
university. He's got just the
sort of mind you need. I thought
you might be able to help. He' 's
still living at home after all.
He's not witi us at school any
more but I'm prepared to go on
with the private coaching.
REG: And what does his wife say about
KATE: I don't mind him having a job.
But I don't think he'd be happy.
I mean he won't be doing what he
wants to do.
JEAN: Yes but this was his. own
decision wasn't it? And if it
brings him a good job----I mean
he obviously wasn't satisfied with
the way his life was going was he?
REG (TO KATE) You and Gordoj are
thelimit, honestly! Aren't you in
contact?
JEAN:
All right Reg.
KATE: The thing is I've got my
finals---before the child comes
along--
REG: I can see why he wants to
get a job. Can't you Kate? He
wants to look after his wife and
child. It stands to reason.
JEAN (TO KATE, PROUDLY) He went
straight to your dad then?
KATE: Yes.
JEAN: Where would this currying
be then?
KATE: In italy.
JEAN:
KATE:
Dad wants him to take charge
of a group of hotels eventually,
when he knows enough Italian.
JEAN QWITH A LAUGH) Well, we've
got our holidays mapped out for us
then! No more Majorca, and
Brighton in the lean years, eh Reg?
REG STROKES HIS CHIN, SEEING HER


POINT WITH RELISH BUT NOT DARING
TO SHOW IT.
CUT TO ESMERALDA 'S LANGUAGE CLASS.
SHE AND GORDON ARE THE ONLY ONES
THERE.
ESMERALDA: So-what were we saying
at the beginning? Io ho dieci
sterlini da apendere---'I have ten
pounds to spend'. * How much have I
to spend?
GORDON: Ten.
ESMERALDA (ICILY) In Italian
please.
ESMERALDA: Dieci. And what is
the currency, of which I have ten
to spend?
GORDON:
ESMERALDA: Sterlini- --pounds.
AND who has ten pounds to spend?
GORDON: Er-m-
ESMERALDA: Io. 'I' have. Not
GORDON: Du.
ESMERALDA: 'Du', Gordon, is
German. We are speaking Italian.
(GAZING AT HIM) Gordon, what are
you thinking about all the time?
HE GAZES BACK AT HER.
GORDON: Mediaeval history.
CUT TO THE HOTEL BEDROOM WHERE
KATE AND GORDON HONEYMOONED. a
GORDON IS IN BED AS BEFORE, AND
AGAIN HE IS READING 'CHURCH AND
STATE IN THE MIDDLE AGES'. KATE
DRIFTS IN FROM THE BEDROOM.
SHE IS GETTING UNDRESSED.
KATE: You've got a fix on the
middle ages haven't you?
GORDON: Well, life was simpler
then.
KATE: People lived like dogs.
GORDON: Some did, Whereas younlike
factories and fast roads, don't
you?
KATE: Yes,


GORDON:
Why?
KATE:
Because I'm Italian. We
had the middle ages too long.
GORDON (TAKING A LETTER FROM THE
BACK OF HIS BOOK) Mr Trelawny
wrote me a letter. Like to have
a look?
SHE TAKES THE LETTER.
KATE (READING IT) What papers is
he talking about? Have you been
sending him essays?
GORDON: Yes.
KATE (WITH A LAUGH) But you've given
it all up! You are a goof! I
mean you're not at school or
university or even half way between
the two!
GORDON: I know, that's what he
says.
KATE (READING) 'What's the use
Gordon? These papers are first
class but who's going to read them
apart from me?' Well there you
are. (GAZING AT HIM) Do you
want to try for Sussex, one last
shot? Why not Gordon?
GORDON: It'd be the same. e The
minute I know I've got to do it I
stop enjoying it. I mean I think
you need freedom to think. I don't
know how all these people do it-
think to order! I have to think
when I feel like iti
KATE: Anyway, you're here to
learn Italian from me. That's the
idea of sending us here isn't it?
And ever since you got here you've
had your head stuck in that book---
(playfully trying to wrestle the
book away from him).
THEY LAUGH, STRUGGLE, KISS.
GORDON: We'll have a lesson later.
You can teach me the parts of the
body.
KATE (LYING ON THE BED) Is that
honestly what you've been doing,
writing essays?
GORDON: Yes.
KATE: But why?


GORDON:
Bexause it's useless.
(SHE LAUGHS AGAIN) If somebody
came along and said do it because
it'll bring you in a bit of money
I couldn't. But if the work isn't
for something I can get interested.
I don't feel anybody breathing down
my neck. I'm just not intesrested
in exams, I'm interested in history,
the people---what they did. And
that' s supposed to be wrong! You're
supposed to learn history to get a
job. Well, that's not being inter-
ested in history, it's being inter-
ested in a job. Do you see what
I mean? The same with Italian.
I could learn Italian if it wasn't
going to get me anywhere. I'm
interested in Italian, not in get-
ting somewhere with it. And all
those people who go to your mother's
class aren't interested in Italian,
they just want to make some money.
And she blames me for not learning
it like they
like a lot of
parrots. I
know, people are
ddoie
so daft nowadays, they say make some
money and then they tell you to
read a book or learn a language.
And they don't have anything to do
with each other!
KATE: You ought to explain that
to mum.
GORDON: Yes but then it'd be
useful. So I couldn't. I can
only explain it to you because it's
useless. I mean, you believe in
me anyway. So there's no point in
telling you. That's why I tell you.
CUT TO THE PAGE LIVING ROOM. IT
IS EVENING.
GORDON IS ALONE.
HE IS AT THE TABLE WITH BOOKS BEFORE
HIM, WRITING BUSILY.
THERE IS A
NOISE AT THE FRONT DOOR. HE STOPS.
IT IS REG AND JEAN. HE PUTS THE
PEN DOWN AND LEANS BACK. THERE IS
THE SOUND OF STAMPING FEET ON THE
MAT, AND WHEWING AND BLOWING SOUNDS.
REG (VO)
Blimey, I reckon it's
going. to snow tonight.
REG AND JEAN COME IN, TAKING THEIR
COATS OFF.
JEAN: Hullo, you back? I thought
you was seeing Kate tonight.
REG SIMPLY GIVES GORDON A GLANCE
AND GOES OUTSIDE TO HANG HIS COAT
REG (TO JEAN) What about a cup of


tea?
JEAN: All right, let me get inside
the door!
REG (HITH A LOOK AT GORDON'S BOOKS)
Turning this place into your study
then?
GORDON: : I'll go upstairs.
REG: Listen, we had Madam Ridolifi
here last night.
She said you're
not learning Italian.
She says
you don't go to her classes any
more. She says you was sacked
from teaching English to foreign
students the first day---she said
you talked about the middle ages
all the time and they didn't under-
stand a blime word!
You're the
limit aren't you? I reckon the idea
of bringing you into the world was
to break my heart---I can't see any
other reason! You're spending me
out of house and home---I can't go
on forking out---and I'm not having
your mother working at the Co-op
JEAN (GETTING THE TEA) All right
all right!
REG (TURNING ON HER) Well, you tell
me what to do then---is he going to
stay with us all his life? And what
about his kid? He s never going to
see the kid at this rate. His kid'll
be grown
and earning good money,
and he'll be sitting at grandad's
writing essays! And Madam Ridolifi
told me all about Kate too.
She
said she passed all her e xams with
flying colours and she's going to
find a decent job! Here---CLOWER-
ING HIS HEAD TO GORDON'S LEVEL) I
reckon you're soft in the headi
That's what I reckon!
JEAN: All right all right!
REG (SITTING IN HIS CHAIR AND
BEGINNING TO TAKE OFF HIS SHOES)
A week at rhe sea to learn Italian!
Double room and bath, meals all
paid for! Lucky Esmeralda's got the
money to do it because I couldn't.
Not that you did learn any Italian,
even from your own wife.
GORDON: I learned the parts of
the body.
REG:
Yes I know you blinkingly
well did! She told me! What are


you going to do in Italy then,
when you're running hotels--tell
the manager what a big arse he's
got!
'Parts of the body'! You
make me sick!
CUT TO A HOSPITAL WAITING ROOM AS
THE CRY OF A NEWBORN INFANT COMES
OVER.
ESMERALDA, GIORGIO, REG AND
JEAN ARE WAITING ANXIOUSLY. A
NURSE APPEARS AT THE DOOR AND SMILES
AT THEM.
NURSE (QUIETLY) It's a boy. Five
and a half pounds.
ESMERALDA: Un Tigliol (JUMPING UP
AND GOING TO THE NURSE)
Can we see
her?
NURSE:
Not quite yet.
I'll
let you know.
THE .NURSE LEAVES.
ESMERALDA GOES
TO JEAN AND KISSES HER ON BOTH
CHEEKS.
JEAN (EMBARRASSED) Five and a half
pounds eh?
GIORGIO SHAKES HANDS WITH REG.
ESMERALADA (STILL HOLDING JEAN CLOSE)
And the child's father?
JEAN:
Well I don't know I'm sure!
Reg---didn't he say he was on his
way? (AS REG LOOKS BEWILDERED)
Gordon!
REG:
Isn't he here then? I thought
he was inside with Kate.
ESMERALDA:
Oh my God he's deserted
herl
GIORGIO:
Ma Esmeralda!
ESMERALDA: It happened to your
cousin---in Bari--on the day of
the birth---he was never seen again!
REG: He said he was coming.
mean, he's absent-minded but it's
not like Gordon to be absent from a
birth is it Jean?
ESMERALDA: You have such afunny
son Mrs Page. - Of course he's very.
dear to us both. And Kate adores
him. Do you know what he told


me?---he says that if people ask
him to think about one thing he
starts thinking about the opposite,
without meaning to. So he' 's
probably gone to the cemetery, as
this is a birth! And my daughter
has a lifetime of Gordon in front
of her---think of that!
JEAN:
kell I'm sure he's some-
where!
ESMERALDA (ICILY) I never doubted
that.
THE DOOR BURSTS OPEN AND GORDON COMES
GORDON:
It's aboy!
Five and a
half pounds!
REG: Yes we've just heard son.
GORDON:
I've seen it all on
television!
ESMERALDA: 0 Dio!
REG:
You what?
GORDON: With some staudents.
It's a closed circuit television.
The matron let me. I think women
are marvellous! I never knew
women were like that!
People don't
realise---it's marvellous giving
birth---I think women are marvellous!
There isn't one of them isn't some-
body big and important, do you see
what I mean?--I méan we can(t do
anything like that, men can't!
REG: OK, son.
ESMERALDA (PUTTING HER ARMS ROUND
GORDON WITH A LAUG :) You didn't
think about something else then,
while she was giving birth? You
didn't think about old men, seeing
a newborn baby?
GORDON (NOT UNDERSTANDING) No,
why?
ESMLRALDA (GIVING HIM A KISS) So
my darling you can go on having
babies for the rest of your life-
then people will forgive you every-
thing, at least Italians will!
CUT TO THE PAGE LIVING ROOM.
GORDON IS SITTING AT THE TABLE
AGAIN WITH BOOKS BEFORE HIM.
WE PAN ROUND TO FIND KATE ON THE
OTHER SIDE, WATCHING HIM IN SILENCE.


KATE:
I'd love it here.
It's
so peaceful.
You're lucky being
born in the working class.
GORDON: 'Working class'!
Doesn't
exist any more.
There's money behind
everything---
KATE:
So there is in the other
class---only worse.
GORDON:
Yes but you can't get
round it here, it's in the pavements,
it sort of glitters up at you.
Everybody seems to be thinking inside
little schedules---they-60 out in
the morning and they all come back
at. night, and it feels like a
cemetery in the day. They've
forgotten how to live.
KATE: So why go on doing that
(INDICATING HIS BOOKS)?
GORDON: Hell I can't any more--
it doesn't work---I just put the books
here so as not just to stare into
space and realise I'm a spare,
I've got no job and--
(LOOKING
AT HER EARNESTLY)
Why don't you
divorce me?
KATE (WITH A LAUGH) It's not
in my. blood! Italians stand
anything once they've got a child.
Even things like you!
HE SMILES.
KATE:
You seem about a hundred
years older since the baby.
GORDON:
I feel it.
KATE:
I've been offered a job.
At a cartographer's. I've been
frightened to tell you. (THEY GAZE
AT ÉACH OTHER IN SILENCE) It's
good money. I don't mind working
while you stay at home and read.
You could even try for a place
again, you could take your time.
My tutorwas saying they like
people to come up when they're
about twenty-three, because they're
more mature. Please Gordon, I


don't feel good living separate
any more!
(BEGINNING TO CRY)
Dad wants you with us tool Italian
families are diffent! They like to
be together! They don't think
anything of a man being idle, if
that's really his nature... And if
he's a father...
Gordon!
SHE GOES OVER TO HIM.
GORDON: If I lived at your place
I'd feel even more unreal.
KATE (WITH ESMERALDA'S ANGER FOR A
MOMENT) What does it matter what
you feel? You'd be with your own
child!
GORDON: Yes, I know. Feelings
don't matter. But---(WITH A SHRUG).
I wouldn't know how to get away from
them, not if I had nothing to do all
day!
KATE: But you say you love reading!
and writing papers for Trelawny!
GORDON: And he sends them back!
Because it doesn't lead anywhere.
That's what I hear in my brain alll
the time when I'm reading---it's not
leading anywhere!
KATE: Then that makes you like
your father! It means you agree
with himl---that life's got to be
a grind before it's reall Look at
you sitting there, grinding at your
books when you want to be outside
with me or playing with the baby!
You're the one who wants it to lead
somewhere---why? If you're happy
just reading why don't you
instead of thinking where 1d9 s going
to lead? You say you don't want
to think about exams and jobs and
money all the time, well then, come
and live with us, and you can read
all day, and you canplay with the
baby when you don't wantbto read!
You could do lots of things---you
might want to do an external. course-
you might start liking exams! You
don't know how you'd change in a
different place! (WITH A SIGH)
Sometimes you. .seem stupid Gordon.
And it's only because you dream.
And yau worry. And I know you'd
hate yourself if you came to live
with us...
GORDON: Yes I would. Seeing you
and your mum and dad all go out in
the morning, and leave me and the
baby behind---I can imagine how it'd


KATE (SLUMPING DOWN IN A CHAIR
AGAIN) So there's no solution.
No job, no university, no reading
even.
Just nothing.
GORDON:
No I don't say that.
KATE: Well tell me what there is
then? You leave school and say
you're going to get a job, and you
ask dad for a job and he offers you
one, and then you can't learn Italian,
and now you can't even read either--
because it doesn't lead anywhere.
Yet you're supposed to believe in
things not leading anywhere (PUTTING
HER HAND TO HER HEAD IN CONFUSION)...
GORDON: I do believe in things
not leading anywhere. I mean a man
should just be interested in his
subject and he shouldn't think of
themoney that comes out of it.
You've got to have thinkers. That's
the trouble nowadays, there's no
one to think, there are only people
scrambling and fighting each other
for money, and they use whatever
they've got for the fight---and I'm
not going to use all this (NODDING
TOWARDS THE BOOKS) for fighting.
I'd rather work with my hands.
You've got to have thinkers. That's
the trouble today. Everything's
going to get smashed up because of
that. There' 's no one allowed to
sit and think things out. He's
always somebody' else's slave.
Working for somebody else's idea.
So he can't think straight in the
end. That's what I think. Some-
body's got to stop and say, I won 't
do it. Otherwise everything gets
smashed up. I mean, everybody's
blind. Things just happen nowadays.
Nobody's in charge Kate, you see,
because there's nobody allowed to
think things out. One chap's a
specialist in flat feet, another
one does urine tests, somebody else
makes precision instruments. And
all got their noses down and
tastren see the whole picture, they
can't ask themselves what's it all
for because then if they didn't W ant
to do it they'd starve, so every-
body's helping to smash the world
ap, and I'm not going to.
KATE:
Don't then. I don't want
you to. I agree with what you say.
So come and live with us. But you
couldn't. You'd hate yourself!
Why? It means you don't really
believe in what you're saying!


GORDON:
It means my upbringing's
got under my skin. Yes, I agree there.
KATE: So why not get away?
GORDON:
And sit and' hate myself?
KATE (CRYING SILENTLY) Gordon...
GORDON: Listen, I'll find a place
for us to live. That's the best answer
of the lot isn't it?
KATE (NODDING AND TRYING TO SMILE) Yest
CUT TO THE PAGE LIVING ROOM IN THE
EARLY MORNING. JEAN IS GETTING BREAK-
FAST.
THE TABIE IS LAID FOR THREE.
JEAN (CALLING) Reg! It's past
eight, come on!
REG (VO) I'll be therel
JEAN (CALLING) Gordon!
NO REPLY. REG COMES IN IN HIS OVERALLS.
REG: I smell eggs and bacont
JEAN: And tomatoes. And fried bread.
REG: You're spbiling me. A Sunday
breakfast every day! (SITTING DOWN)
But don't think you can fool me, my
girl. You're doing it to tickle his
appetite aren't you? (AS SHE PUTS
A STEAMING PLATE BEFORE HIM) That's
it, a nice big helping for dadl
JEAN: Grandad you mean.
REG: Don't remind me. (TUCKING IN)
I bet he don't eat it just the same o
JEAN (IN THE KITCHENETTE) I was think-
ing last.night, she 's turned out ever
such a good little mother hasn't she?
Bid you see the way she did that
nappy?
REG: She starts work next month then.
JEAN: Yes.
REG: I don't knowl---his wife earning
and
JEAN: Well it's no good harping on it!
GORDON COMES IN.
REG:
Hullo mate.


GORDON:
Morning.
JEAN:
I was saying about Kate,
she looks as if she' 's been pinning
up nappies all her life.
GORDON (SITTING DOWN)
Italian
blood.
REG (DRINKING HIS TEA) That would
have been the life eh?---if that
hotel-idea had worked out and you'd
have been sent out there to look
after a whole network.
Still, dreams!
They can't stop us having them can
they mate?
GORDON: No.
JEAN BRINGS GORDON'S BREAKFAST.
GORDON (TO REG) I was going to
ask you something.
REG:
What?
GORDON: I've got to find a place
for me and Kate to live.
REG: Yes?
GORDON: Can you fix me up with a
job down at the Electricity Board?
I mean for a bit? I mean, I. know
how to do the work, I've watched
you at it all my life.
JEAN STANDS GAZING AT HIM.
REG (ABASHED) Well, I don't know
how they stand for giving jobs.
GORDON: I mean, what about it?
REG: I could have a bash, with the
personnel manager.
JEAN:
Yes but Gordon---
GORDON: Oh don't make it bad
please! I've got to do itl
REG (GETTING UP) Here, son, you
don 'tvhave to got worked up about
it (PUTTING HIS HAND ON GORDON'S
SHOULDER)! You're all right. You're
OK. I'li see what I can do.
GORDON: It's only for a bit.
REG: Of course it is. You'll
make it some day. You don't need


a university education for what
you're after.
GORDON: Yes but---(LOOKING UP AT
HIM) what am I after?
REG (WALKING AWAY BACK TO HIS BREAK-
FAST, WITH A SHRUG) A new kind of
man, I suppose!
JEAN:
Come on, eat your breakfast
son.
GORDON LOOKS DOWN AT HIS BREAKFAST
AND THEN BEGINS EATING WITHOUT APP-
ETITE AS THE TITLES COME UP.